A Dose of Reality
Chapter Sixteen - A Dose of Reality
The woman that Lauren had called her mother stepped off the elevator and walked between them, turned left and headed down a hallway. Lauren turned and followed her automatically. Aragorn and Legolas looked at each other before hurrying to follow her. Lauren trailed unthinkingly after her mother until she pushed through a set of double doors halfway down the hallway. When they reached the doors marked with the letters ICU, Lauren stopped so suddenly that Aragorn ran into her back before he was able to stop. She didn't even notice.
"Lauren?" Aragorn asked in concern as he reached out to lay a hand on her shoulder.
Her face was pale when she turned back to face them. "I just figured out what is going on. There's a reason we can't interact with anything here and how that surgery showed things I have no knowledge of. Aragorn, we're not in the dream world anymore. We're in my world. Somehow, we found our way into my reality. This is the intensive care unit, where I apparently reside." A fearful glance over her shoulder showed just how shaken she was by this unexpected change in their location.
Aragorn and Legolas stared at her in amazement. They had not expected that response. Visiting her in the dream world was one thing. Actually being in her world, twenty thousand years into their future was quite another. After a moment's contemplation, Aragorn decided it made sense, in a way. For them to climb the stairs, they had to imagine the stairs being there. The dream world which was the one that they could touch, could interact with, was still underlying this world. Though they could not see the structure of that world, they were still in control of it. If Aragorn were to imagine a wall in front of them in the same place a wall stood in her reality, they would no longer be able to walk through it. But they still would not be interacting with things in this world. They had the role of disembodied spirits here.
As Lauren looked back over her shoulder again, a look of fear mixed with resolve crossed her face. Turning around, she started to walk through the doors her mother had entered.
Reaching out, Aragorn placed a hand on her shoulder. "You do not have to do this." He feared what it was they would see if they ventured forward.
Taking a deep breath, she looked back at him. "Yes, I do."
Legolas placed his hand on her other shoulder. "Then know that you do not face this alone."
She nodded briefly, then started forward again, with the both of them close on her heels. As they walked through the doors, Aragorn stared around in curiosity. There was a central desk with several people sitting behind it. Around the desk, rather than having individual rooms, there were sections partitioned off with three walls and a pull curtain across the fourth side. People in beds occupied many of these sections. Some of the people were obviously injured. Aragorn saw many people with bandages and casts, but not all of the occupants had visible injuries. Whether or not there were visible injuries, however, almost all of the people were connected to various tubes and wires. Glancing over, Aragorn saw that Legolas was also looking around in a kind of apprehensive wonder.
When Lauren stopped this time, Aragorn felt her hand steal into his. He squeezed her hand in reassurance and she squeezed back tightly in response. Legolas murmured some reassurance to her, and Aragorn saw that her other hand was held tightly in one of Legolas'. Taking a deep breath and squaring her shoulders, she walked through the curtain that she had seen her mother disappear behind, pulling Aragorn and Legolas with her. At the sight that met their eyes, her hands tightened crushingly on theirs.
The first thing Lauren saw was the metal contraption suspended above the bed. Following the lines down to the bed, she found a pair of legs, both suspended in traction, propped up on pillows. A metal pin protruded from each knee, and it was these pins that were connected to the traction device. Both legs were bandaged heavily and held immobile. Her eyes tracked slowly up the body in the bed. Though the body was covered in a blanket to the chest, both arms were on top of the blanket. They didn't seem to be broken, though there was a bandage wrapped around the left wrist, and there were numerous cuts and bruises decorating the length of both arms; angry red lines slashed across skin tinged a purplish-yellow. Stitches held several of the worst cuts closed. IV tubes ran to the back of the right hand and a heart monitor was clamped on the tip of the right index finger. A steady beeping filled the room indicating a slow heartbeat. Lauren's eyes reluctantly moved up past those lax arms to look at the face of the person in the bed. She dispassionately noted the thick tube taped to the mouth; the tube extended down into the lungs and was attached to the ventilator. There was a feeding tube running into the nose, and both eyes were taped shut to prevent them from drying out. There was a bandage wrapped around the forehead, and a hint of ugly purple bruises peeking out from underneath the bandages. Dark limp hair framed the far too pale face and highlighted the dark bruises sprinkled across the side of the face that they could see.
'Poor thing,' Lauren thought to herself. She knew that the woman in the bed had to be her, but it didn't seem real. Somehow, the past week and a half in her made-up world seemed much more real than this moment.
As Lauren focused on the face of the woman in the bed, a hand reached down to rest lightly on her face, and Lauren looked up at the owner of the hand. Her father stood there, tenderly stroking the cheek of the still figure in the bed.
"Daddy?" Lauren released Aragorn and Legolas' hands and stepped forward hesitantly until she was standing beside her father. Reaching out, she placed her hand on his shoulder. Or, she meant to place her hand on his shoulder. When her hand passed through him instead, she quickly stepped back in surprise.
"Lauren?" her father asked softly. He looked around and glanced briefly at his shoulder before scanning the rest of the room.
"What is it?" Lauren's mother asked from where she sat in a chair at the foot of Lauren's bed.
"I thought…" he looked down to see Lauren's hands lying limply on the bed, as they had been for many days now. "Never mind, it must have been my imagination."
Lauren's mother searched his face for a moment with hope in her eyes. Lauren and her father were especially close, and if something were going to change in Lauren's condition, he would probably be the first to know. The disappointment in his face made her own expression fall, and she looked back to her lap while Lauren's father fixed his gaze firmly on Lauren's face.
"Oh, my sweet baby," Lauren heard him whisper. "When are you going to wake up and show us those gorgeous silver eyes? I'd give anything in this world just to have you wake up and tell us you're OK." His voice cracked slightly, and Lauren was startled to see a tear trail down his face. She had rarely ever seen her father cry.
Her father's words and that single tear broke through her detachment, and tears filled her own eyes. The sudden realization that the woman truly was her struck with the force of a freight train. Her legs gave out and she sank toward the floor.
Aragorn and Legolas each caught an arm and eased her down to the floor gently.
For a long moment after entering the room, Aragorn could only stare in horror at the figure in the bed. Though he had spent more than a week in Lauren's company, he almost could not recognize her features. The bandages, bruises, and medical equipment did much to obscure her face, but it was the lack of expression that made it most difficult to match her features to Lauren. The woman he had come to know was so expressive that her features were rarely still. When he had convinced himself that it was indeed Lauren, he looked over to see how the others were reacting. Legolas looked nearly sick as he realized how badly injured Lauren was. Lauren, however, stood perfectly still and composed as she examined her body. He had been stunned when her father apparently sensed that she had touched him. It seemed that not all the abilities of the line of Elrond and Elros had disappeared. Aragorn knew that Lauren's stoic reaction would not last, and he and Legolas were ready to move when her legs gave out underneath her.
As soon as she was seated on the floor, Lauren brought her knees to her chest, wrapped her arms around them and stared unseeingly into the distance. "Oh God, Oh God, Oh God Oh God OhGodOhGodOhGod…" Her words blurred into a long never-ending mantra as she began rocking gently back and forth. Aragorn was unsure if her words were a prayer or simply a reaction to the situation. He placed a hand on her back, in an attempt to get her attention. There was no reaction from her. As far as he could tell, Lauren didn’t even know they were there.
A sudden movement made Aragorn and Legolas look up, away from Lauren. Her father had turned and was now staring at a machine behind him and her mother had approached the bed with a worried look on her face. "Dan, what's going on?"
Aragorn started briefly, as he heard the woman call Lauren's father by one of Elladan's nicknames. Shrugging off his surprise, he concentrated on what was happening. Aragorn realized that the slow beeping he had heard earlier now had a more rapid pace. It did not take him more than a moment to realize that the beeping matched Lauren's heartbeat, and was a way to monitor her condition. Glancing back at Lauren huddled on the floor, he came to the conclusion that her reaction was affecting her physical body. He was unsure if an increased heart rate was a good sign at the moment or not. However, the near gasping rate of Lauren's breathing, if it affected her physical body, might lead to more difficulties.
"Lauren?" Aragorn rubbed her shoulder gently, trying to get a sign from her indicating that she was aware of her surroundings at all. He thought it would be a very good idea to calm her down, before she did something that might worsen her condition. Legolas followed his lead and crouched on her other side, talking to her and doing his best to break her out of her trance.
Aragorn's head whipped around as the curtain separating the small room from the larger area was drawn back suddenly and a pair of legs walked right through him. Standing swiftly and taking a few steps back, Aragorn shook his head. That was an extremely odd experience. It was not one he wished to repeat, either. He looked over at the woman who had just entered. She was wearing a pair of white pants and a colorful short sleeve shirt. Though it did not exactly match the other uniforms he had seen, Lauren had assured him that this was a style of clothing worn by nurses in present day hospitals. The woman crossed over to the machines that monitored Lauren's physical state, gently gesturing for Lauren's parents to move out of her way. She studied the machines for a moment, then asked Lauren's parents to leave while she called the doctor.
Lauren's parents looked as if they wanted to argue, but nodded instead. Aragorn thought they looked resigned to the situation, as if they had gone through something like this many times before. Lauren's father took her mother's hand in his as they moved to leave the room, then he hesitated and looked back at the nurse.
"You'll have the doctor talk to us when she is done?" Lauren's father asked.
The nurse nodded. "Of course. If you'll just wait in the waiting room, I'll let her know that she can find you there." Lauren's parents nodded and left the room with one last backward glance at Lauren. The nurse then pressed a button on the wall and requested that Dr. Martin join her.
Knowing that more people would be arriving, Aragorn decided it would be best to move Lauren out of the way. He didn't want her or Legolas to be walked through as he had been. Walking through a wall was not so bad, but having people walk through you was entirely unnerving. He crouched back down by Lauren, but could not get her to acknowledge his presence. Deciding it would be easier to simply move her, he picked her up in his arms as he would a child and stood up. She gave no sign that she had noticed. Looking around, Aragorn spotted a chair in the corner out of the way. "The chair," he said, gesturing to it with his chin.
Legolas, having stood as well when Aragorn picked Lauren up, glanced uncertainly at the chair, then back to Aragorn. "She will fall through to the floor, Aragorn."
Aragorn rolled his eyes. "Not if we imagine that the chair exists in the world that we can touch, as we did the stairs." Suiting actions to words, Aragorn strode over to the chair, concentrating on imagining that they could touch the chair. As he reached the chair, he moved his foot forward to make sure he could touch the chair before lowering Lauren down into it. She immediately curled back up as she had been on the floor, rocking herself gently back and forth, though she had ceased her mantra and was now eerily silent. He and Legolas exchanged helpless looks as they each took up a position on either side of her, resting a hand on her shoulder protectively.
Another woman in an open white coat swept into the room and moved over beside the nurse. The two women exchanged greetings and spent more time examining the monitors before going to Lauren's side. Aragorn listened to their highly technical conversation and was able to determine that the tube in Lauren's throat had been breathing for her, but now, for the first time, she was taking breaths in between the timing of the device. He watched with great curiosity as the doctor leaned over and disconnected the device from the tube. When Lauren took a breath on her own, without the aid of the device, the doctor and nurse exchanged a smile. They observed her for several minutes, to make sure that she was breathing normally before moving to pull the tube from her throat. Aragorn winced as he saw the tube removed. Lauren would surely have a sore throat for awhile after the tube's removal. That could not have been comfortable. The doctor checked all of Lauren's monitors once more and jotted a few notes down on a chart, then began to walk out of the room. "I'm assuming the Ellises are in the waiting room?"
"Yes, they are. They're waiting for you."
"As I would expect. Thank you, Kim." The nurse nodded as the doctor left the room.
"I want to hear what she intends to tell Lauren's parents," Aragorn said. He glanced down at Lauren, still huddled in the chair. "Will you stay with her?"
"Of course," Legolas nodded.
"Hannon le." Aragorn followed the doctor out of the room.
Legolas was left alone in the room with the two versions of Lauren. The version containing her conscious mind was still curled up in the chair, and her physical body was unmoving in the bed. He crouched down in front of her and placed his hands on her arms. "Lauren?" As before, he received no response. "I wish Aragorn had stayed with you," he commented. "I do not know how to help you." A faint sound came from Lauren, and he leaned forward to hear what it was. It took only a moment to realize that she was humming, but so faintly that even his elven hearing could barely pick it up. For the first time, he heard the music that was emanating from the radio near her bed. He had been so pre-occupied by everything else in the room and Lauren's reaction that it had escaped his notice. A smile crossed his face. Music, of course! What else would reach Lauren in her current state?
Placing a hand against Lauren's face, he gently turned her face toward him. The look in her eyes was unfocused, distant, and he knew she did not see him. Taking one of her hands in his, he began to sing, an elven song of hope, of finding light in the darkness. Watching her face as he sang, he saw her eyes gradually begin to focus. By the time he ended the song, her gaze was focused on his face. "Lauren, how are you feeling?"
"A little fuzzy," she admitted, looking around the room. "Where's Aragorn?"
"The doctor left the room to talk with your parents, and Aragorn wanted to hear what they were told." Legolas watched her face carefully as he spoke, trying to gauge her reaction.
Lauren sat up straighter, uncurling her body and putting her feet firmly on the floor. Pushing herself to her feet, she looked at Legolas, who had also risen to his feet. "Shall we join them?"
"Are you sure you wish to hear what will be said?" Legolas asked cautiously, studying her pale face.
"No, but I think I need to hear it, and it's better than staying in this room." She rubbed her hands over her face as if to scrub away the cobwebs remaining in her head, then lowered her hands and squared her shoulders, preparing for what she would encounter next.
Legolas could not argue with her statement. He agreed that it would be a good idea to remove Lauren from this room. Neither of them could resist a last look back at the still body on the bed as they left the room, though.
----
Aragorn had no trouble following the doctor through the corridors to the waiting room where Lauren's parents were anxiously waiting for word on their daughter's condition. They rose quickly from their chairs as they saw the doctor approaching them.
"How is she?" Lauren's father asked as the doctor came to a stop in front of them.
"She is doing better," the doctor answered. She had learned that this particular set of parents wanted a daily briefing as to their daughter's condition, and did not want anything left out. She assumed it had to do with a lifetime in the military. In response to that, she gave them a concise summary of what they wanted to hear. "She has started breathing on her own. That is a great milestone, and gives us a better hope that she may recover enough to wake up soon. Understand that I can make no guarantees about that, but it is a good sign."
Both parents nodded in understanding. "What about the infection in her legs?" Dan asked.
"We seem to have it under control," the doctor said. "Her fever has dropped a bit, and the visible signs of infection in her legs are fading. The other sites of her surgeries are doing well, and they show no signs of infection."
Aragorn's brow furrowed in concern. What surgeries were the doctor referring to, and what kinds of surgery had been done on Lauren's legs?
"And there is no danger that Lauren will lose her legs?" her father asked, his forehead crinkled in his concern. He gently squeezed his wife's hand as she drew in a deep, steadying breath.
Aragorn inhaled sharply at the thought. He did not know how Lauren would survive the loss of her legs. Imagining the active, vibrant woman he had come to know and love losing her legs nearly made him sick to his stomach.
The doctor's response was cautious. "As you know, her legs were badly crushed in the accident. We were able to save them, but just barely. You were told at the outset that there was still a possibility she could end up losing them if they did not heal properly. There is no sign of tissue necrosis, which means that none of the tissue died in the accident or intervening hours. That's good. The infection was not such a good thing. It set her recovery back quite a bit, but we think that is under control now. She has good blood flow through her legs, and as of yesterday, she was reacting to painful stimuli. That was also a good sign. For the first week after the accident, she showed no signs that she could feel her legs."
Aragorn brought his hand up to cover his mouth in his concern. He could tell from looking at her legs that she had been seriously injured, but he had not known how close she had come to having them amputated. He could truly not bear to think about it. Lauren was so active that he didn't know if she would be able to adapt to having to give up all those things she loved to do.
"Aragorn," a voice called his name, and Aragorn turned to see Legolas and a very pale Lauren walking toward him. An eyebrow rose unconsciously as he saw Lauren moving under her own power. "How are you feeling?" he asked her as they approached him.
"Better," Lauren answered shortly. She turned her attention to the doctor who was continuing her 'briefing' to Lauren's parents.
"As you are aware, her back was also injured in the accident. She avoided breaking her back, and we can find no sign that the spinal cord was damaged, but the massive bruising in her back caused swelling to press on her spinal cord. That swelling was the reason she did not seem to be able to feel her legs. As the swelling has gone down, she has shown signs that she is now able to feel her legs."
"Yeah, tell me about it," Lauren said softly, reaching down to rub her leg absently.
"We do not think there is any danger of her being paralyzed. But none of us can predict how complete her recovery will be. There is a chance she will never walk again, or never walk without some form of assistance. I don't say this to scare you, but merely to prepare you for the worst possibilities."
Aragorn and Legolas swiftly grabbed Lauren by the arms as she swayed on her feet. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, but managed to stay on her feet this time. Opening her eyes, she focused once more on the doctor's face.
"What about her internal injuries?" Dan queried.
"She's doing well after the surgery to remove her spleen. There may be problems later, as she will be more prone to infections and pneumonia now, but there were no complications from the surgery itself. She will have to take Penicillin for the rest of her life but she seems to be healing well. Her three broken ribs are also healing well. It's almost a good thing that she hasn't been moving around much, as she has not put any strain on her ribs or the muscles around them as she heals. For the seriousness of her injuries, she is really doing very well."
"And her head injury?" Lauren's mother asked. "Why isn't she waking up?"
The doctor sighed slightly. "With all of our understanding of the body, the brain still remains a mystery. We can't say why she has not woken up. We can't even say whether she has suffered brain damage, or to what extent. At this point, I can't tell you much beyond the fact that her autonomous reflexes are apparently still working as she has just started breathing on her own again. Her earlier MRI indicates that her brain is still active, and there are no blood clots or other visible physical problems."
"I'm not brain-damaged," Lauren muttered under her breath. "I can hear and understand every word you're saying."
"But she has no way of knowing that," Aragorn pointed out calmly.
"No, I guess no one would expect the invisible form of a coma patient to be standing right next to them as they describe her condition," Lauren agreed. She waved her hand in front of the doctor's face. "I wonder if anyone else is wandering the hallways like we are. It could be interesting to meet a few other coma patients. We could have a party, or, I know," she said with a false and somewhat sickly smile and snapping her fingers, "we could form a club. It would be a pretty exclusive club I think… Though I'm not sure anyone would want to pay the initiation fees."
Aragorn couldn't help a soft snort at Lauren's recitation. She did have a strange sense of humor.
The doctor spoke with Lauren's parents for a few more moments before taking her leave of them and going to tend to her other patients. Lauren watched as her parents hugged each other.
"She's getting better," her father reassured her mother. "It won't be long now before she wakes up and starts complaining about wanting to get out of the hospital." Lauren's mother smiled, but didn't reply. "You'll see," he said confidently. "She's a fighter, she won't give up so easily."
At that, Lauren's mother did reply. "Of course she's a fighter. She's your daughter, isn't she?" She took a deep breath and looked stronger. "You're right. She's strong, she'll be fine. We should go call the kids and tell them that Lauren is breathing on her own. They could use the good news, and we can't go back to see Lauren for another forty-five minutes."
Dan smiled lovingly at his wife. She tracked every minute that they were away from Lauren. They were only allowed to visit for fifteen minutes every hour, and their last visit had been interrupted. "Come on then, we have to make sure we're back in time for our next visit." He kissed her hand, then led her down the hallway. Though he wouldn't admit it out loud, he wouldn't dream of missing a single visit either. He loved all his children, but he had a special place in his heart for his only daughter. No matter how old she grew, she would still be his little girl. If it had been possible, he would have gladly traded places with her. He just had to trust his own words. She would fight to recover and she would. It would be a battle, but he trusted in her strength and determination to make a full recovery.
------
Lauren watched as her parents walked down the hallway with a sheen of tears in her eyes. "I love you too," she whispered. "But I think you overestimate me. I don't know if I have the strength to face this."
Aragorn turned her to face him. "Of course you do. No, it will not be easy, and it will take a lot of effort, but you can face this and you can recover from this. You are not alone in your battles, Lauren. Your parents are obviously here to help you through this, and I do not think they are the only ones. Your family and your friends will be there to help you with whatever you need. They will not abandon you to face this on your own. Trust in their love and lean on them when you need to borrow their strength."
Shaking her head, Lauren looked away from him. "Aragorn, you heard what she said. I may never walk again. I can't imagine a world where I can't run, or go hiking through the woods. I guess I won't be running that marathon after all, and I'll probably never get to hang-glide for real." She pushed herself away from him and began pacing as she felt panic well up inside her.
"Lauren, the doctor did not say that you would never walk again. She could not predict how complete your recovery would be. You are not paralyzed, and can feel your legs. You are not without hope." Aragorn decided not to tell her that he had heard the doctor say there was still a small chance that she could lose her legs. That would not help the situation any. He kept his eyes on her as she paced back and forth across the waiting room.
"I have to get out of here," Lauren muttered. "How the hell do we get back to the dream world? I think I'll just stay there for awhile."
Aragorn sighed as he saw Lauren getting more worked up over this. "Lauren, you cannot simply retreat into the dream world. If you try to run from your troubles, you will not succeed. As soon as you stop running, you will find the problems still there. Facing troubles is the only way to move on with your life. You have people here who love you. They desperately want you to wake up and reassure them that you are well. Do you not have a responsibility to them?"
Lauren turned quickly on him. "Tell them I'm well? Do you want me to lie to them? Because I'm not well, Aragorn! You saw what kind of shape I'm in. Are you going to tell me that I'm OK and everything is going to be fine? I don't want your platitudes, Aragorn. Things are not fine!" She was gesturing sharply as she spoke, her movements stiff and angry.
"Lauren," Aragorn's voice was commanding, designed to cut through her panic. "You are a daughter of kings and elves. You are stronger than you know. I have come to know you in our time together, and I agree with your father. You are a fighter; you will make it through this. Once you wake up, you will face each day as it comes, fighting only each battle as it comes. Right now you see only how far you have to go, but each journey begins with a single step. Take only one step at a time, and you will eventually reach your goal."
"And if you can't take a single step?" Lauren asked snidely. "It's easy for you to say all this, you aren't in my position. I doubt either of you have been in a position where you were facing the idea of never being able to walk again. When you leave here and wake up, you'll be perfectly healthy and able to walk. When I leave here and wake up, I'll be facing more pain than I've ever had in my whole life, and the fact that my whole life has changed overnight." She threw up her hands and resumed her pacing, but it had a rather frantic tone to it now. "I can't deal with this right now, I just can't." The last line was uttered under her breath.
Aragorn exchanged a helpless glance with Legolas. Nothing he had said seemed to be helping at all. Legolas had once told him that he had a way of inspiring people to go beyond what they thought themselves capable of and that he brought hope to all he met. Somehow, those gifts seemed to have disappeared. Lauren was not responding well to anything he said.
As Lauren desperately paced back and forth, their surroundings abruptly changed once more. The shimmer that flashed briefly told Aragorn and Legolas that they had just left Lauren's reality behind and once again returned to the dream world. Unfortunately, they seemed to have appeared in the middle of a barren desert. Lauren did not seem to be in the proper mood to conjure an appealing location. With a moment's concentration, Aragorn conjured up a wooded location. Lauren only noticed when she almost walked into a tree. She glanced sideways at Aragorn and changed her path only enough to avoid the tree as she continued pacing.
Aragorn decided to try once more. "Lauren, you once told me that you believed your accident was 'part of a grander scheme of things' that you could not yet see. You believed that we were meant to meet. Do you no longer believe that?"
Whirling around to face him, Lauren waved her arm to indicate her entire situation. "How can I believe that this is part of some grand design? I can't imagine that God decided that it would be to anyone's benefit to put me in a wheelchair. And please don’t tell me that 'suffering is good for the soul' or that what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. I really don't want to hear it."
Glancing over at Legolas, Aragorn saw that the elf was as confused as he was. He had never heard the supposed sayings that Lauren tossed back at them. That had not been what he was about to say. Opening his mouth to reply, he closed it again as Lauren spoke over him.
"And if this whole thing happened so that I could meet you, I'm sorry, but given the option to go on living my life as a whole person, I'd gladly forgo the 'honor' of meeting you both." She nearly spat the word honor, her face twisted in her anger.
Aragorn's eyebrows climbed toward his hairline as he crossed his arms over his chest. Lauren's tone was bitter, harsh. There would be no reasoning with her in this mood. Perhaps the best thing would be to keep quiet and let her talk things out for herself. So far, everything he had said had only served to increase her anger.
Lauren turned away and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself, but a horrible idea occurred to her, and she rounded on them again.
"And what if you're not even real?" she questioned Aragorn and Legolas plaintively. "How do I know that you're not just something my mind came up with to keep me from going insane here? The doctor said I could have brain damage. What if you two are just some elaborate hallucination, and there really is no purpose to this?"
"Are we truly back to that?" Aragorn asked, staring at her in disbelief. He threw up a hand as if he were trying to brush away the thought. "You are truly the most stubborn person I have ever met. After everything we have shared, do you truly think that we only exist in your mind?"
"I don't know," Lauren said, standing still as her anger drained away, leaving her feeling empty, desolate. Her shoulders slumped and she sighed tiredly. "I need to be alone and think things through for myself right now. Be good hallucinations and go away."
This last retort did not have the bite of her earlier insults. She seemed weary, defeated, and that worried Aragorn. He opened his mouth to give an angry retort, thinking that her anger was better than the empty look of utter despair now in her eyes.
"No," Lauren said firmly, stopping Aragorn's words. "I said leave me alone." With that, Lauren waved her hand in their direction, and Aragorn and Legolas found themselves flying backwards as if a troll had picked them up and thrown them.
----
Aragorn sat up in bed suddenly, breathing hard. Arwen, startled out of her sleep, sat up beside him, and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"What is wrong, my love?" Her voice was soft and concerned as she took in the look on his face.
"Lauren," Aragorn gasped, still feeling off balance. This was like no other time he had left her world. For a moment, he had been unsure of where he was. It was thoroughly disorienting. "She threw us out of her world."
"Threw you out?" Arwen asked in disbelief. She was about to ask for more details when the door to their chamber opened and Legolas stepped quickly inside, closing the door behind him. He crossed the room and pulled a chair up near their bed. Arwen stared at Legolas. He seemed disheveled, having obviously come straight from bed, not having taken the time to either change from his sleep clothes or brush his hair. Seldom had Arwen seen him like this. "What happened?" she asked in bemusement. Her voice grew more suspicious as she looked back to Aragorn. "What did you do?"
"Do?" Aragorn asked, affronted that she would believe he had caused Lauren to throw them out of her world. "We didn't do anything."
Arwen looked to Legolas. "Legolas?" Her tone of voice made it clear that he should answer as honestly and quickly as he could.
"Lauren was angry at her situation, and we were unable to get her calmed down." That was as close as he could come to describing the whole scene in a single sentence.
Aragorn ran his hand through his hair and glared at Legolas. "We? I didn't see you making much of an effort to calm her down. You never even said anything once she started yelling."
"I could see that it would not do any good to say anything," Legolas shrugged. "Every word out of your mouth only served to make her angrier. I did not think she needed to be mad with both of us."
His mouth dropped open as he stared at Legolas. Glancing sideways, he saw Arwen's lips twitch in amusement at their argument. "It is not funny, Arwen. I am very concerned for Lauren."
"As am I," Legolas admitted, leaning forward in his chair and resting his elbows on his knees. "She did not react at all well to seeing herself. I came to see if you were willing to try to get back to her. She does not need to be alone at the moment."
"She saw herself?" Arwen asked. This conversation was getting more confusing by the minute. "If one of you does not explain this to my satisfaction very soon, I will not be happy."
Taking a deep breath, Aragorn admitted to himself that as much as he wanted to get back to Lauren, he would not be able to fall asleep until he had calmed himself down. Taking Arwen's hand in his and stroking it soothingly, he launched into the story of what had happened that night. He picked up his story with the unusual effect in the change in scenery when they made a visit to the hospital. Legolas chimed in with his own observations and thoughts as Aragorn explained.
Arwen listened intently as Aragorn described what they found when they walked into Lauren's hospital room, and Lauren's reaction to it. "She is in shock," Arwen decided as the tale continued.
"Yes," Aragorn agreed. "And she is not in the mood to listen to anything we say, but she does not need to be alone to dwell upon her darkest thoughts." He told her of the argument and finished by describing the despair he had seen in her eyes just before she ejected them forcibly from the dream world. "We need to return," he stated firmly as he finished the tale.
"Agreed," Arwen said. "And I shall return with the both of you. It sounds like she will need a more sympathetic person there who will grieve with her for what she has lost. She is not ready to hear about fighting a battle to regain her life, Aragorn. Grief must come first before she can accept her situation and prepare to face it."
Closing his eyes, Aragorn realized Arwen was right. He had taken the wrong approach with Lauren. She would need encouragement to continue, yes, but that was not what she needed right now. Lying back on the bed, he pulled Arwen down to curl up beside him. "Yes, it would be good if you accompanied us." He looked back over at Legolas. "Would you like to return to your chambers?"
Legolas shook his head and moved to a more comfortable plush chair. Sinking down into it and curling up, he leaned his head on the arm of the chair. "I will remain here as we test whether or not we can return. I believe that Lauren has the ability to keep us out if she does not desire our company."
Nodding his acceptance, Aragorn relaxed back into the bed and held Arwen's hand against his chest. He would probably need her help to relax enough to try falling asleep again.
After an hour of trying, Aragorn was forced to admit defeat. He had actually been able to fall asleep twice, but did not return to Lauren's dream world. She was successfully blocking them. Aragorn gave a weary sigh as he looked back to where Legolas was sleeping soundly in the chair, waiting for Aragorn's signal to join him in the dream world. Arwen brushed his hair out of his face and sighed at the defeated look on his face. It was near dawn, but her husband was not ready to face the responsibilities and duties of the day. "I will make some of Ada's tea, Aragorn. You need at least a few hours rest before you take on the responsibilities of a kingdom. Faramir can handle your morning appointments. I will explain everything to him. You need your rest."
It was a measure of how tired and defeated Aragorn felt that he did not protest. Arwen brought him the tea and he quickly drained it before lying back on his side and falling asleep. Arwen set the cup on the bedside table before rejoining her husband. She lay against his back, draping one arm around his waist and resting her head against his. "Sleep well, my love." She left Legolas sleeping where he was, and thought about Lauren and what her future held. "Ilúvatar, watch over all the members of my family, wherever and whenever they exist." After this brief but heartfelt prayer, she relaxed back into the arms of sleep and a sense of peace fell over all the occupants of the room.
The woman that Lauren had called her mother stepped off the elevator and walked between them, turned left and headed down a hallway. Lauren turned and followed her automatically. Aragorn and Legolas looked at each other before hurrying to follow her. Lauren trailed unthinkingly after her mother until she pushed through a set of double doors halfway down the hallway. When they reached the doors marked with the letters ICU, Lauren stopped so suddenly that Aragorn ran into her back before he was able to stop. She didn't even notice.
"Lauren?" Aragorn asked in concern as he reached out to lay a hand on her shoulder.
Her face was pale when she turned back to face them. "I just figured out what is going on. There's a reason we can't interact with anything here and how that surgery showed things I have no knowledge of. Aragorn, we're not in the dream world anymore. We're in my world. Somehow, we found our way into my reality. This is the intensive care unit, where I apparently reside." A fearful glance over her shoulder showed just how shaken she was by this unexpected change in their location.
Aragorn and Legolas stared at her in amazement. They had not expected that response. Visiting her in the dream world was one thing. Actually being in her world, twenty thousand years into their future was quite another. After a moment's contemplation, Aragorn decided it made sense, in a way. For them to climb the stairs, they had to imagine the stairs being there. The dream world which was the one that they could touch, could interact with, was still underlying this world. Though they could not see the structure of that world, they were still in control of it. If Aragorn were to imagine a wall in front of them in the same place a wall stood in her reality, they would no longer be able to walk through it. But they still would not be interacting with things in this world. They had the role of disembodied spirits here.
As Lauren looked back over her shoulder again, a look of fear mixed with resolve crossed her face. Turning around, she started to walk through the doors her mother had entered.
Reaching out, Aragorn placed a hand on her shoulder. "You do not have to do this." He feared what it was they would see if they ventured forward.
Taking a deep breath, she looked back at him. "Yes, I do."
Legolas placed his hand on her other shoulder. "Then know that you do not face this alone."
She nodded briefly, then started forward again, with the both of them close on her heels. As they walked through the doors, Aragorn stared around in curiosity. There was a central desk with several people sitting behind it. Around the desk, rather than having individual rooms, there were sections partitioned off with three walls and a pull curtain across the fourth side. People in beds occupied many of these sections. Some of the people were obviously injured. Aragorn saw many people with bandages and casts, but not all of the occupants had visible injuries. Whether or not there were visible injuries, however, almost all of the people were connected to various tubes and wires. Glancing over, Aragorn saw that Legolas was also looking around in a kind of apprehensive wonder.
When Lauren stopped this time, Aragorn felt her hand steal into his. He squeezed her hand in reassurance and she squeezed back tightly in response. Legolas murmured some reassurance to her, and Aragorn saw that her other hand was held tightly in one of Legolas'. Taking a deep breath and squaring her shoulders, she walked through the curtain that she had seen her mother disappear behind, pulling Aragorn and Legolas with her. At the sight that met their eyes, her hands tightened crushingly on theirs.
The first thing Lauren saw was the metal contraption suspended above the bed. Following the lines down to the bed, she found a pair of legs, both suspended in traction, propped up on pillows. A metal pin protruded from each knee, and it was these pins that were connected to the traction device. Both legs were bandaged heavily and held immobile. Her eyes tracked slowly up the body in the bed. Though the body was covered in a blanket to the chest, both arms were on top of the blanket. They didn't seem to be broken, though there was a bandage wrapped around the left wrist, and there were numerous cuts and bruises decorating the length of both arms; angry red lines slashed across skin tinged a purplish-yellow. Stitches held several of the worst cuts closed. IV tubes ran to the back of the right hand and a heart monitor was clamped on the tip of the right index finger. A steady beeping filled the room indicating a slow heartbeat. Lauren's eyes reluctantly moved up past those lax arms to look at the face of the person in the bed. She dispassionately noted the thick tube taped to the mouth; the tube extended down into the lungs and was attached to the ventilator. There was a feeding tube running into the nose, and both eyes were taped shut to prevent them from drying out. There was a bandage wrapped around the forehead, and a hint of ugly purple bruises peeking out from underneath the bandages. Dark limp hair framed the far too pale face and highlighted the dark bruises sprinkled across the side of the face that they could see.
'Poor thing,' Lauren thought to herself. She knew that the woman in the bed had to be her, but it didn't seem real. Somehow, the past week and a half in her made-up world seemed much more real than this moment.
As Lauren focused on the face of the woman in the bed, a hand reached down to rest lightly on her face, and Lauren looked up at the owner of the hand. Her father stood there, tenderly stroking the cheek of the still figure in the bed.
"Daddy?" Lauren released Aragorn and Legolas' hands and stepped forward hesitantly until she was standing beside her father. Reaching out, she placed her hand on his shoulder. Or, she meant to place her hand on his shoulder. When her hand passed through him instead, she quickly stepped back in surprise.
"Lauren?" her father asked softly. He looked around and glanced briefly at his shoulder before scanning the rest of the room.
"What is it?" Lauren's mother asked from where she sat in a chair at the foot of Lauren's bed.
"I thought…" he looked down to see Lauren's hands lying limply on the bed, as they had been for many days now. "Never mind, it must have been my imagination."
Lauren's mother searched his face for a moment with hope in her eyes. Lauren and her father were especially close, and if something were going to change in Lauren's condition, he would probably be the first to know. The disappointment in his face made her own expression fall, and she looked back to her lap while Lauren's father fixed his gaze firmly on Lauren's face.
"Oh, my sweet baby," Lauren heard him whisper. "When are you going to wake up and show us those gorgeous silver eyes? I'd give anything in this world just to have you wake up and tell us you're OK." His voice cracked slightly, and Lauren was startled to see a tear trail down his face. She had rarely ever seen her father cry.
Her father's words and that single tear broke through her detachment, and tears filled her own eyes. The sudden realization that the woman truly was her struck with the force of a freight train. Her legs gave out and she sank toward the floor.
Aragorn and Legolas each caught an arm and eased her down to the floor gently.
For a long moment after entering the room, Aragorn could only stare in horror at the figure in the bed. Though he had spent more than a week in Lauren's company, he almost could not recognize her features. The bandages, bruises, and medical equipment did much to obscure her face, but it was the lack of expression that made it most difficult to match her features to Lauren. The woman he had come to know was so expressive that her features were rarely still. When he had convinced himself that it was indeed Lauren, he looked over to see how the others were reacting. Legolas looked nearly sick as he realized how badly injured Lauren was. Lauren, however, stood perfectly still and composed as she examined her body. He had been stunned when her father apparently sensed that she had touched him. It seemed that not all the abilities of the line of Elrond and Elros had disappeared. Aragorn knew that Lauren's stoic reaction would not last, and he and Legolas were ready to move when her legs gave out underneath her.
As soon as she was seated on the floor, Lauren brought her knees to her chest, wrapped her arms around them and stared unseeingly into the distance. "Oh God, Oh God, Oh God Oh God OhGodOhGodOhGod…" Her words blurred into a long never-ending mantra as she began rocking gently back and forth. Aragorn was unsure if her words were a prayer or simply a reaction to the situation. He placed a hand on her back, in an attempt to get her attention. There was no reaction from her. As far as he could tell, Lauren didn’t even know they were there.
A sudden movement made Aragorn and Legolas look up, away from Lauren. Her father had turned and was now staring at a machine behind him and her mother had approached the bed with a worried look on her face. "Dan, what's going on?"
Aragorn started briefly, as he heard the woman call Lauren's father by one of Elladan's nicknames. Shrugging off his surprise, he concentrated on what was happening. Aragorn realized that the slow beeping he had heard earlier now had a more rapid pace. It did not take him more than a moment to realize that the beeping matched Lauren's heartbeat, and was a way to monitor her condition. Glancing back at Lauren huddled on the floor, he came to the conclusion that her reaction was affecting her physical body. He was unsure if an increased heart rate was a good sign at the moment or not. However, the near gasping rate of Lauren's breathing, if it affected her physical body, might lead to more difficulties.
"Lauren?" Aragorn rubbed her shoulder gently, trying to get a sign from her indicating that she was aware of her surroundings at all. He thought it would be a very good idea to calm her down, before she did something that might worsen her condition. Legolas followed his lead and crouched on her other side, talking to her and doing his best to break her out of her trance.
Aragorn's head whipped around as the curtain separating the small room from the larger area was drawn back suddenly and a pair of legs walked right through him. Standing swiftly and taking a few steps back, Aragorn shook his head. That was an extremely odd experience. It was not one he wished to repeat, either. He looked over at the woman who had just entered. She was wearing a pair of white pants and a colorful short sleeve shirt. Though it did not exactly match the other uniforms he had seen, Lauren had assured him that this was a style of clothing worn by nurses in present day hospitals. The woman crossed over to the machines that monitored Lauren's physical state, gently gesturing for Lauren's parents to move out of her way. She studied the machines for a moment, then asked Lauren's parents to leave while she called the doctor.
Lauren's parents looked as if they wanted to argue, but nodded instead. Aragorn thought they looked resigned to the situation, as if they had gone through something like this many times before. Lauren's father took her mother's hand in his as they moved to leave the room, then he hesitated and looked back at the nurse.
"You'll have the doctor talk to us when she is done?" Lauren's father asked.
The nurse nodded. "Of course. If you'll just wait in the waiting room, I'll let her know that she can find you there." Lauren's parents nodded and left the room with one last backward glance at Lauren. The nurse then pressed a button on the wall and requested that Dr. Martin join her.
Knowing that more people would be arriving, Aragorn decided it would be best to move Lauren out of the way. He didn't want her or Legolas to be walked through as he had been. Walking through a wall was not so bad, but having people walk through you was entirely unnerving. He crouched back down by Lauren, but could not get her to acknowledge his presence. Deciding it would be easier to simply move her, he picked her up in his arms as he would a child and stood up. She gave no sign that she had noticed. Looking around, Aragorn spotted a chair in the corner out of the way. "The chair," he said, gesturing to it with his chin.
Legolas, having stood as well when Aragorn picked Lauren up, glanced uncertainly at the chair, then back to Aragorn. "She will fall through to the floor, Aragorn."
Aragorn rolled his eyes. "Not if we imagine that the chair exists in the world that we can touch, as we did the stairs." Suiting actions to words, Aragorn strode over to the chair, concentrating on imagining that they could touch the chair. As he reached the chair, he moved his foot forward to make sure he could touch the chair before lowering Lauren down into it. She immediately curled back up as she had been on the floor, rocking herself gently back and forth, though she had ceased her mantra and was now eerily silent. He and Legolas exchanged helpless looks as they each took up a position on either side of her, resting a hand on her shoulder protectively.
Another woman in an open white coat swept into the room and moved over beside the nurse. The two women exchanged greetings and spent more time examining the monitors before going to Lauren's side. Aragorn listened to their highly technical conversation and was able to determine that the tube in Lauren's throat had been breathing for her, but now, for the first time, she was taking breaths in between the timing of the device. He watched with great curiosity as the doctor leaned over and disconnected the device from the tube. When Lauren took a breath on her own, without the aid of the device, the doctor and nurse exchanged a smile. They observed her for several minutes, to make sure that she was breathing normally before moving to pull the tube from her throat. Aragorn winced as he saw the tube removed. Lauren would surely have a sore throat for awhile after the tube's removal. That could not have been comfortable. The doctor checked all of Lauren's monitors once more and jotted a few notes down on a chart, then began to walk out of the room. "I'm assuming the Ellises are in the waiting room?"
"Yes, they are. They're waiting for you."
"As I would expect. Thank you, Kim." The nurse nodded as the doctor left the room.
"I want to hear what she intends to tell Lauren's parents," Aragorn said. He glanced down at Lauren, still huddled in the chair. "Will you stay with her?"
"Of course," Legolas nodded.
"Hannon le." Aragorn followed the doctor out of the room.
Legolas was left alone in the room with the two versions of Lauren. The version containing her conscious mind was still curled up in the chair, and her physical body was unmoving in the bed. He crouched down in front of her and placed his hands on her arms. "Lauren?" As before, he received no response. "I wish Aragorn had stayed with you," he commented. "I do not know how to help you." A faint sound came from Lauren, and he leaned forward to hear what it was. It took only a moment to realize that she was humming, but so faintly that even his elven hearing could barely pick it up. For the first time, he heard the music that was emanating from the radio near her bed. He had been so pre-occupied by everything else in the room and Lauren's reaction that it had escaped his notice. A smile crossed his face. Music, of course! What else would reach Lauren in her current state?
Placing a hand against Lauren's face, he gently turned her face toward him. The look in her eyes was unfocused, distant, and he knew she did not see him. Taking one of her hands in his, he began to sing, an elven song of hope, of finding light in the darkness. Watching her face as he sang, he saw her eyes gradually begin to focus. By the time he ended the song, her gaze was focused on his face. "Lauren, how are you feeling?"
"A little fuzzy," she admitted, looking around the room. "Where's Aragorn?"
"The doctor left the room to talk with your parents, and Aragorn wanted to hear what they were told." Legolas watched her face carefully as he spoke, trying to gauge her reaction.
Lauren sat up straighter, uncurling her body and putting her feet firmly on the floor. Pushing herself to her feet, she looked at Legolas, who had also risen to his feet. "Shall we join them?"
"Are you sure you wish to hear what will be said?" Legolas asked cautiously, studying her pale face.
"No, but I think I need to hear it, and it's better than staying in this room." She rubbed her hands over her face as if to scrub away the cobwebs remaining in her head, then lowered her hands and squared her shoulders, preparing for what she would encounter next.
Legolas could not argue with her statement. He agreed that it would be a good idea to remove Lauren from this room. Neither of them could resist a last look back at the still body on the bed as they left the room, though.
----
Aragorn had no trouble following the doctor through the corridors to the waiting room where Lauren's parents were anxiously waiting for word on their daughter's condition. They rose quickly from their chairs as they saw the doctor approaching them.
"How is she?" Lauren's father asked as the doctor came to a stop in front of them.
"She is doing better," the doctor answered. She had learned that this particular set of parents wanted a daily briefing as to their daughter's condition, and did not want anything left out. She assumed it had to do with a lifetime in the military. In response to that, she gave them a concise summary of what they wanted to hear. "She has started breathing on her own. That is a great milestone, and gives us a better hope that she may recover enough to wake up soon. Understand that I can make no guarantees about that, but it is a good sign."
Both parents nodded in understanding. "What about the infection in her legs?" Dan asked.
"We seem to have it under control," the doctor said. "Her fever has dropped a bit, and the visible signs of infection in her legs are fading. The other sites of her surgeries are doing well, and they show no signs of infection."
Aragorn's brow furrowed in concern. What surgeries were the doctor referring to, and what kinds of surgery had been done on Lauren's legs?
"And there is no danger that Lauren will lose her legs?" her father asked, his forehead crinkled in his concern. He gently squeezed his wife's hand as she drew in a deep, steadying breath.
Aragorn inhaled sharply at the thought. He did not know how Lauren would survive the loss of her legs. Imagining the active, vibrant woman he had come to know and love losing her legs nearly made him sick to his stomach.
The doctor's response was cautious. "As you know, her legs were badly crushed in the accident. We were able to save them, but just barely. You were told at the outset that there was still a possibility she could end up losing them if they did not heal properly. There is no sign of tissue necrosis, which means that none of the tissue died in the accident or intervening hours. That's good. The infection was not such a good thing. It set her recovery back quite a bit, but we think that is under control now. She has good blood flow through her legs, and as of yesterday, she was reacting to painful stimuli. That was also a good sign. For the first week after the accident, she showed no signs that she could feel her legs."
Aragorn brought his hand up to cover his mouth in his concern. He could tell from looking at her legs that she had been seriously injured, but he had not known how close she had come to having them amputated. He could truly not bear to think about it. Lauren was so active that he didn't know if she would be able to adapt to having to give up all those things she loved to do.
"Aragorn," a voice called his name, and Aragorn turned to see Legolas and a very pale Lauren walking toward him. An eyebrow rose unconsciously as he saw Lauren moving under her own power. "How are you feeling?" he asked her as they approached him.
"Better," Lauren answered shortly. She turned her attention to the doctor who was continuing her 'briefing' to Lauren's parents.
"As you are aware, her back was also injured in the accident. She avoided breaking her back, and we can find no sign that the spinal cord was damaged, but the massive bruising in her back caused swelling to press on her spinal cord. That swelling was the reason she did not seem to be able to feel her legs. As the swelling has gone down, she has shown signs that she is now able to feel her legs."
"Yeah, tell me about it," Lauren said softly, reaching down to rub her leg absently.
"We do not think there is any danger of her being paralyzed. But none of us can predict how complete her recovery will be. There is a chance she will never walk again, or never walk without some form of assistance. I don't say this to scare you, but merely to prepare you for the worst possibilities."
Aragorn and Legolas swiftly grabbed Lauren by the arms as she swayed on her feet. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, but managed to stay on her feet this time. Opening her eyes, she focused once more on the doctor's face.
"What about her internal injuries?" Dan queried.
"She's doing well after the surgery to remove her spleen. There may be problems later, as she will be more prone to infections and pneumonia now, but there were no complications from the surgery itself. She will have to take Penicillin for the rest of her life but she seems to be healing well. Her three broken ribs are also healing well. It's almost a good thing that she hasn't been moving around much, as she has not put any strain on her ribs or the muscles around them as she heals. For the seriousness of her injuries, she is really doing very well."
"And her head injury?" Lauren's mother asked. "Why isn't she waking up?"
The doctor sighed slightly. "With all of our understanding of the body, the brain still remains a mystery. We can't say why she has not woken up. We can't even say whether she has suffered brain damage, or to what extent. At this point, I can't tell you much beyond the fact that her autonomous reflexes are apparently still working as she has just started breathing on her own again. Her earlier MRI indicates that her brain is still active, and there are no blood clots or other visible physical problems."
"I'm not brain-damaged," Lauren muttered under her breath. "I can hear and understand every word you're saying."
"But she has no way of knowing that," Aragorn pointed out calmly.
"No, I guess no one would expect the invisible form of a coma patient to be standing right next to them as they describe her condition," Lauren agreed. She waved her hand in front of the doctor's face. "I wonder if anyone else is wandering the hallways like we are. It could be interesting to meet a few other coma patients. We could have a party, or, I know," she said with a false and somewhat sickly smile and snapping her fingers, "we could form a club. It would be a pretty exclusive club I think… Though I'm not sure anyone would want to pay the initiation fees."
Aragorn couldn't help a soft snort at Lauren's recitation. She did have a strange sense of humor.
The doctor spoke with Lauren's parents for a few more moments before taking her leave of them and going to tend to her other patients. Lauren watched as her parents hugged each other.
"She's getting better," her father reassured her mother. "It won't be long now before she wakes up and starts complaining about wanting to get out of the hospital." Lauren's mother smiled, but didn't reply. "You'll see," he said confidently. "She's a fighter, she won't give up so easily."
At that, Lauren's mother did reply. "Of course she's a fighter. She's your daughter, isn't she?" She took a deep breath and looked stronger. "You're right. She's strong, she'll be fine. We should go call the kids and tell them that Lauren is breathing on her own. They could use the good news, and we can't go back to see Lauren for another forty-five minutes."
Dan smiled lovingly at his wife. She tracked every minute that they were away from Lauren. They were only allowed to visit for fifteen minutes every hour, and their last visit had been interrupted. "Come on then, we have to make sure we're back in time for our next visit." He kissed her hand, then led her down the hallway. Though he wouldn't admit it out loud, he wouldn't dream of missing a single visit either. He loved all his children, but he had a special place in his heart for his only daughter. No matter how old she grew, she would still be his little girl. If it had been possible, he would have gladly traded places with her. He just had to trust his own words. She would fight to recover and she would. It would be a battle, but he trusted in her strength and determination to make a full recovery.
------
Lauren watched as her parents walked down the hallway with a sheen of tears in her eyes. "I love you too," she whispered. "But I think you overestimate me. I don't know if I have the strength to face this."
Aragorn turned her to face him. "Of course you do. No, it will not be easy, and it will take a lot of effort, but you can face this and you can recover from this. You are not alone in your battles, Lauren. Your parents are obviously here to help you through this, and I do not think they are the only ones. Your family and your friends will be there to help you with whatever you need. They will not abandon you to face this on your own. Trust in their love and lean on them when you need to borrow their strength."
Shaking her head, Lauren looked away from him. "Aragorn, you heard what she said. I may never walk again. I can't imagine a world where I can't run, or go hiking through the woods. I guess I won't be running that marathon after all, and I'll probably never get to hang-glide for real." She pushed herself away from him and began pacing as she felt panic well up inside her.
"Lauren, the doctor did not say that you would never walk again. She could not predict how complete your recovery would be. You are not paralyzed, and can feel your legs. You are not without hope." Aragorn decided not to tell her that he had heard the doctor say there was still a small chance that she could lose her legs. That would not help the situation any. He kept his eyes on her as she paced back and forth across the waiting room.
"I have to get out of here," Lauren muttered. "How the hell do we get back to the dream world? I think I'll just stay there for awhile."
Aragorn sighed as he saw Lauren getting more worked up over this. "Lauren, you cannot simply retreat into the dream world. If you try to run from your troubles, you will not succeed. As soon as you stop running, you will find the problems still there. Facing troubles is the only way to move on with your life. You have people here who love you. They desperately want you to wake up and reassure them that you are well. Do you not have a responsibility to them?"
Lauren turned quickly on him. "Tell them I'm well? Do you want me to lie to them? Because I'm not well, Aragorn! You saw what kind of shape I'm in. Are you going to tell me that I'm OK and everything is going to be fine? I don't want your platitudes, Aragorn. Things are not fine!" She was gesturing sharply as she spoke, her movements stiff and angry.
"Lauren," Aragorn's voice was commanding, designed to cut through her panic. "You are a daughter of kings and elves. You are stronger than you know. I have come to know you in our time together, and I agree with your father. You are a fighter; you will make it through this. Once you wake up, you will face each day as it comes, fighting only each battle as it comes. Right now you see only how far you have to go, but each journey begins with a single step. Take only one step at a time, and you will eventually reach your goal."
"And if you can't take a single step?" Lauren asked snidely. "It's easy for you to say all this, you aren't in my position. I doubt either of you have been in a position where you were facing the idea of never being able to walk again. When you leave here and wake up, you'll be perfectly healthy and able to walk. When I leave here and wake up, I'll be facing more pain than I've ever had in my whole life, and the fact that my whole life has changed overnight." She threw up her hands and resumed her pacing, but it had a rather frantic tone to it now. "I can't deal with this right now, I just can't." The last line was uttered under her breath.
Aragorn exchanged a helpless glance with Legolas. Nothing he had said seemed to be helping at all. Legolas had once told him that he had a way of inspiring people to go beyond what they thought themselves capable of and that he brought hope to all he met. Somehow, those gifts seemed to have disappeared. Lauren was not responding well to anything he said.
As Lauren desperately paced back and forth, their surroundings abruptly changed once more. The shimmer that flashed briefly told Aragorn and Legolas that they had just left Lauren's reality behind and once again returned to the dream world. Unfortunately, they seemed to have appeared in the middle of a barren desert. Lauren did not seem to be in the proper mood to conjure an appealing location. With a moment's concentration, Aragorn conjured up a wooded location. Lauren only noticed when she almost walked into a tree. She glanced sideways at Aragorn and changed her path only enough to avoid the tree as she continued pacing.
Aragorn decided to try once more. "Lauren, you once told me that you believed your accident was 'part of a grander scheme of things' that you could not yet see. You believed that we were meant to meet. Do you no longer believe that?"
Whirling around to face him, Lauren waved her arm to indicate her entire situation. "How can I believe that this is part of some grand design? I can't imagine that God decided that it would be to anyone's benefit to put me in a wheelchair. And please don’t tell me that 'suffering is good for the soul' or that what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. I really don't want to hear it."
Glancing over at Legolas, Aragorn saw that the elf was as confused as he was. He had never heard the supposed sayings that Lauren tossed back at them. That had not been what he was about to say. Opening his mouth to reply, he closed it again as Lauren spoke over him.
"And if this whole thing happened so that I could meet you, I'm sorry, but given the option to go on living my life as a whole person, I'd gladly forgo the 'honor' of meeting you both." She nearly spat the word honor, her face twisted in her anger.
Aragorn's eyebrows climbed toward his hairline as he crossed his arms over his chest. Lauren's tone was bitter, harsh. There would be no reasoning with her in this mood. Perhaps the best thing would be to keep quiet and let her talk things out for herself. So far, everything he had said had only served to increase her anger.
Lauren turned away and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself, but a horrible idea occurred to her, and she rounded on them again.
"And what if you're not even real?" she questioned Aragorn and Legolas plaintively. "How do I know that you're not just something my mind came up with to keep me from going insane here? The doctor said I could have brain damage. What if you two are just some elaborate hallucination, and there really is no purpose to this?"
"Are we truly back to that?" Aragorn asked, staring at her in disbelief. He threw up a hand as if he were trying to brush away the thought. "You are truly the most stubborn person I have ever met. After everything we have shared, do you truly think that we only exist in your mind?"
"I don't know," Lauren said, standing still as her anger drained away, leaving her feeling empty, desolate. Her shoulders slumped and she sighed tiredly. "I need to be alone and think things through for myself right now. Be good hallucinations and go away."
This last retort did not have the bite of her earlier insults. She seemed weary, defeated, and that worried Aragorn. He opened his mouth to give an angry retort, thinking that her anger was better than the empty look of utter despair now in her eyes.
"No," Lauren said firmly, stopping Aragorn's words. "I said leave me alone." With that, Lauren waved her hand in their direction, and Aragorn and Legolas found themselves flying backwards as if a troll had picked them up and thrown them.
----
Aragorn sat up in bed suddenly, breathing hard. Arwen, startled out of her sleep, sat up beside him, and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"What is wrong, my love?" Her voice was soft and concerned as she took in the look on his face.
"Lauren," Aragorn gasped, still feeling off balance. This was like no other time he had left her world. For a moment, he had been unsure of where he was. It was thoroughly disorienting. "She threw us out of her world."
"Threw you out?" Arwen asked in disbelief. She was about to ask for more details when the door to their chamber opened and Legolas stepped quickly inside, closing the door behind him. He crossed the room and pulled a chair up near their bed. Arwen stared at Legolas. He seemed disheveled, having obviously come straight from bed, not having taken the time to either change from his sleep clothes or brush his hair. Seldom had Arwen seen him like this. "What happened?" she asked in bemusement. Her voice grew more suspicious as she looked back to Aragorn. "What did you do?"
"Do?" Aragorn asked, affronted that she would believe he had caused Lauren to throw them out of her world. "We didn't do anything."
Arwen looked to Legolas. "Legolas?" Her tone of voice made it clear that he should answer as honestly and quickly as he could.
"Lauren was angry at her situation, and we were unable to get her calmed down." That was as close as he could come to describing the whole scene in a single sentence.
Aragorn ran his hand through his hair and glared at Legolas. "We? I didn't see you making much of an effort to calm her down. You never even said anything once she started yelling."
"I could see that it would not do any good to say anything," Legolas shrugged. "Every word out of your mouth only served to make her angrier. I did not think she needed to be mad with both of us."
His mouth dropped open as he stared at Legolas. Glancing sideways, he saw Arwen's lips twitch in amusement at their argument. "It is not funny, Arwen. I am very concerned for Lauren."
"As am I," Legolas admitted, leaning forward in his chair and resting his elbows on his knees. "She did not react at all well to seeing herself. I came to see if you were willing to try to get back to her. She does not need to be alone at the moment."
"She saw herself?" Arwen asked. This conversation was getting more confusing by the minute. "If one of you does not explain this to my satisfaction very soon, I will not be happy."
Taking a deep breath, Aragorn admitted to himself that as much as he wanted to get back to Lauren, he would not be able to fall asleep until he had calmed himself down. Taking Arwen's hand in his and stroking it soothingly, he launched into the story of what had happened that night. He picked up his story with the unusual effect in the change in scenery when they made a visit to the hospital. Legolas chimed in with his own observations and thoughts as Aragorn explained.
Arwen listened intently as Aragorn described what they found when they walked into Lauren's hospital room, and Lauren's reaction to it. "She is in shock," Arwen decided as the tale continued.
"Yes," Aragorn agreed. "And she is not in the mood to listen to anything we say, but she does not need to be alone to dwell upon her darkest thoughts." He told her of the argument and finished by describing the despair he had seen in her eyes just before she ejected them forcibly from the dream world. "We need to return," he stated firmly as he finished the tale.
"Agreed," Arwen said. "And I shall return with the both of you. It sounds like she will need a more sympathetic person there who will grieve with her for what she has lost. She is not ready to hear about fighting a battle to regain her life, Aragorn. Grief must come first before she can accept her situation and prepare to face it."
Closing his eyes, Aragorn realized Arwen was right. He had taken the wrong approach with Lauren. She would need encouragement to continue, yes, but that was not what she needed right now. Lying back on the bed, he pulled Arwen down to curl up beside him. "Yes, it would be good if you accompanied us." He looked back over at Legolas. "Would you like to return to your chambers?"
Legolas shook his head and moved to a more comfortable plush chair. Sinking down into it and curling up, he leaned his head on the arm of the chair. "I will remain here as we test whether or not we can return. I believe that Lauren has the ability to keep us out if she does not desire our company."
Nodding his acceptance, Aragorn relaxed back into the bed and held Arwen's hand against his chest. He would probably need her help to relax enough to try falling asleep again.
After an hour of trying, Aragorn was forced to admit defeat. He had actually been able to fall asleep twice, but did not return to Lauren's dream world. She was successfully blocking them. Aragorn gave a weary sigh as he looked back to where Legolas was sleeping soundly in the chair, waiting for Aragorn's signal to join him in the dream world. Arwen brushed his hair out of his face and sighed at the defeated look on his face. It was near dawn, but her husband was not ready to face the responsibilities and duties of the day. "I will make some of Ada's tea, Aragorn. You need at least a few hours rest before you take on the responsibilities of a kingdom. Faramir can handle your morning appointments. I will explain everything to him. You need your rest."
It was a measure of how tired and defeated Aragorn felt that he did not protest. Arwen brought him the tea and he quickly drained it before lying back on his side and falling asleep. Arwen set the cup on the bedside table before rejoining her husband. She lay against his back, draping one arm around his waist and resting her head against his. "Sleep well, my love." She left Legolas sleeping where he was, and thought about Lauren and what her future held. "Ilúvatar, watch over all the members of my family, wherever and whenever they exist." After this brief but heartfelt prayer, she relaxed back into the arms of sleep and a sense of peace fell over all the occupants of the room.
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