Five
"For the last time, Jansen, the answer is no!"
"Come on, Wedge, you know you want to! Luke has been down all day. As his friends, it is our sworn duty to cheer him up. Besides, I know you're bored out of your mind, too."
"That's not the point, Jansen. He's a Jedi. How exactly do you plan on sneaking up on him?"
"We won't need to. That's the beauty of my scheme!"
Jack smiled as he listened to the hurried whispers of the two men. Planning something, were they? They'd need his help, then!
"We just dye his flightsuit pink, then toggle his shower to use that special water the Ewoks use for war paint. No sneaking involved!"
Jack snickered.
"What was that?"
Smiling, Jack came out from behind the boxes he'd been using for cover. "Sounds like you two could use a hand with that."
Jansen's face was a study in innocence. "A hand with what?"
"I only have one condition," Jack continued. "You have to do the same for my friends. Without dyeing their clothes, though. They might still need those later on."
"How, exactly, could you possibly help us?"
"I will supply.......a diversion," Jack replied dramatically. "I pull an obvious prank so that they don't notice you two messing around with their belongings."
"What makes you think we're even planning anything?" Jansen was clearly not used to planning pranks with strangers.
"Come, now, gentlemen. Don't insult my intelligence." Jack smiled winningly. "You need my wits to get you through this one, or you'll never pull one over your Jedi."
Jansen frowned, but turned to Wedge. "Well? What do you think?"
Wedge heaved a gusty sigh. "All right. Tonight, after supper." He winced as a thought occurred to him. "We'll have to give your friends a refresher course if we want them to use the shower, though." He pointed threateningly at Jack. "And that diversion had better be good!"
-------
Jack was late for supper that night. Will glared at him suspiciously when he finally arrived, but Jack just gave him an angelic smile as he took a seat. Now even more on his guard, Will was certain to inspect all the food before he took a bite.
Nothing strange happened during the meal, and Will had almost forgotten his suspicions when everyone stood up to leave. The men poured out of the mess hall and back to their rooms. Wedge and Jansen waited, smirking, for Jack's pranks to go into effect.
Nothing happened.
Confused, they tracked the pirate down.
"I thought you were going to distract them!" Jansen accused.
Jack seemed taken aback. "I am."
"But they're already in their rooms!"
Jack just smiled. "Do whatever you need to; they won't be noticing anything for a while."
An unearthly howl came from down the hall.
"What did you do to them?" Wedge whispered.
An innocent smile blossomed on Jack's face. "Me? What makes you think I could possibly be responsible for that dastardly deed? Go! Perform your perfidious pranks elsewhere." He stuck his nose up in the air in a misguided attempt to look miffed.
The two men rolled their eyes and sprinted away to fulfill their mission.
Jack wiped away an imaginary tear as he gazed after them. "Those two remind me of me when I was like them." Whistling, he strode back to his room to wait for morning.
---------
Wedge Antilles was not normally a morning person. In his opinion, early mornings were the worst part of being in the Rebellion. Certain death? No problem. Price on your head? Came with the territory. Waking up before the sun on whatever planet they'd settled on? Not going to happen unless the Emperor himself was knocking on the door. There were only a few things that could get Wedge out of bed before he was fully woken up.
Unfortunately, Wes Jansen was one of them.
"Come on, Wedge, don't you want to see what Luke looks like?"
The words pouring from Wedge's mouth would have made a rancor blush. He quickly burrowed deeper into his bed, pulling his pillow up to protect his head.
"Don't make me resort to drastic measures."
The muffled response sounded remarkably like a threat.
Wes snorted. "That's physically impossible, Wedge, and you know it. Now, come on." He pulled the blankets from the bed.
Wedge sat up irritably. "All right, already, I'm coming."
Jansen threw him some clothes. "Get dressed and meet me at the mess hall. Luke gets there early."
Groaning, Wedge flopped back onto his bed.
--------
The two men didn't quite make it to the mess hall. Before they could arrive there, Wedge's comlink gave a little chirp.
"Hey, Wedge, you awake?" A familiar voice blared.
They exchanged a look of horror. If Han Solo was here, that meant Leia was, too. If Leia was here.......They would never get away with their prank on Luke. Han would think it was funny, but Leia had no patience for pranks.
"Yeah, I'm awake, Han. What brings you here?" Wedge asked in a strangled voice.
"Just came to pick up Luke. We're finally taking a vacation. I talked Leia into taking some time off, now that the problem with Bakura's over."
"Right. Um, is Leia with you?" Wedge asked cautiously.
"Yep. You want to talk to her?"
"No! I mean, that's okay. I can talk to her when I see you.......uh, later." Wedge sighed. Much later, I hope.
"Sure. We'll be here for a day or two, making repairs. We're still not sure where we're going yet."
"Uh-huh. Yeah. Han, I have to go."
"Okay. See you around, Wedge."
Wedge closed down his comlink.
Jansen groaned. "We're dead."
---------
Jack woke up quite refreshed from his sleep and immediately decided to seek out his friends to gauge their reactions. He decided that the first thing any reasonable being would do upon discovering they had been pranked would be to eat, so he headed for the mess hall.
Sure enough, there he found Luke in deep conversation with Legolas. Neither showed signs of changing hair color. Intrigued, Jack grabbed his food and headed for their table.
"So I would have gone back in time and probably changed things to where I wouldn't have been born, and the galaxy would more than likely be a darker place," Luke was saying as Jack slid into the seat next to him. "And what would have happened to you four?"
Jack raised his hand. "I would have used a lot of bad language."
Legolas frowned at him. "I do not believe anything would have happened to us. We are not connected to your time."
Luke nodded. "So, would me doing anything at all in the past change the future? I mean, wouldn't it be changing the future just to step on a Tatooinian sandant?"
"For the ant, certainly," Jack muttered into his breakfast.
"I see what you are saying," Legolas replied, ignoring Jack. "That is why we could not allow you to go through the pool." He winced. "Though I think Aragorn had another reason."
"Another reason?"
"He believes that if you had gone through the pool, you would be forced to join with us and travel the worlds until we are allowed to return home. He already believes that we are only here because of him. I do not think he wants another life on his conscience."
At that moment, Wedge and Jansen burst into the mess hall, talking furiously in whispers. As soon as they caught sight of Luke, they stopped and stared. Catching their eyes, Jack just shrugged. He had no idea why Luke and Legolas' hair hadn't changed color.
The two men grabbed some food and hurried over to sit by Luke, Legolas, and Jack. Wedge was the first to speak.
"Luke, have you taken a shower yet?" His tone was almost too casual.
Luke shook his head. "No. I just went for my morning run. I was going to cool off while I ate."
Wedge and Jansen slumped in their seats, obviously relieved. "Good. Don't take one until we tell you it's safe." They attacked their food with gusto.
"Oh!" Jansen looked up from his meal. "Han and Leia just arrived, Luke. They're going on vacation. They came to pick you up."
"Han and Leia are here?" Luke grinned. "It should be fun telling him where these guys are from, then!" He indicated Legolas and Jack.
Wes snorted. "He won't believe us. Too much hocus-pocus turns his brain off."
Wedge frowned. "We could tell them they're from some distant planet with an unpronounceable name. Then he wouldn't ask about it."
"Good point. If he can't pronounce it, he won't say it." Luke shook his head. "I don't know of any planets like that, though."
"Ooo, I do!" Jansen grinned. "Acamarachernaracrux!"
Wedge just stared. "Is that an actual planet?"
Jansen nodded. "Way out on the Rim. It's a little tiny planet that exports some local drink called rum and some weird little fuzzy animals called 'fesnyngs' that are delicacies on other planets."
Jack perked up. "They export rum?"
Jansen blinked at him. "You've heard of it?"
"Where did you hear about Acama........This planet?" Wedge asked.
Jansen turned pink. "Well, I was bored, so......."
Wedge burst out laughing. "Wes Jansen has actually done something productive?" He shook his head. "This is going to ruin your reputation, you know."
"I was bored, already!"
Han and Leia chose that moment to enter the mess hall. "Luke! I figured you'd be here this early."
Luke rose to give his sister a hug. "Leia, it's good to see you again."
"Hey, kid, you forget about me?"
Luke laughed. "I didn't really plan on hugging you, Han."
"Wedge! Good to see you again. How's that hand?"
Wedge flexed his fingers easily. He'd injured them before Bakura. "Doing good. They still won't let me fly, though."
"Tough luck. But you'll be back in the cockpit before long."
Han and Leia shook hands with Jansen, then turned to Legolas and Jack. Leia, ever the diplomat, spoke first. "And who are your friends?"
Wedge cleared his throat awkwardly. "Han Solo and Leia Organa, meet Legolas and Jack." He frowned. "I don't think I ever caught your last names."
"Sparrow." Jack said.
"Thranduilion," Legolas supplied.
"Right. They're from Acamarachernaracrux. And how are you guys doing?" Wedge said, trying to change the subject quickly.
Han grinned. "Acamarachernaracrux? That's a great place. Good drink. What did they call that local brew?"
Wedge and Jansen exchanged horrified looks.
"Rum. Best drink to have beside you," Jack answered easily. Wedge and Jansen let out the breath they had been holding.
"Right, rum. You wouldn't happen to have any with you, would you?"
Mournfully, Jack shook his head. "Ran out." He heaved a dramatic sigh. "I've been high and dry for weeks."
"Too bad. You want to try some local stuff? I hear that Ewok brandy is enough to tranquilize a tauntaun."
Jack brightened. "I would be delighted."
Han turned to Leia, who was giving him an evil stare. "You don't mind, do you Leia?"
She rolled her eyes. "No. By all means, get yourself roaring drunk. I'll stay here and plan our vacation."
Oblivious to her sarcasm, the two exited.
Wedge sighed heavily. "Well, that went well."
Jansen turned to him accusingly. "'Oh, he won't ask about it. Make it long enough and he'll ignore it!' Good going, Wedge."
"Me? Who was the one who suggested 'Acamarachernaracrux?' As if he wouldn't have heard of it if its primary export is some kind of alcoholic drink!"
Leia glanced back in forth between them. "Do I want to know?"
Luke slung his arm over her shoulder. "No. Believe me, you don't. So, what's this I hear about a vacation?"
Legolas just sat there, oblivious to the talking around him, and continued eating his breakfast. As a result, he was the only one left sitting at their table when Aragorn arrived with his food and slid into the seat across from him.
Legolas looked up in astonishment. Aragorn's once dark locks were now a bright, vibrant red.
Aragorn noticed him looking. "What? What's wrong?"
Legolas just shook his head. "Nothing. I do like your new hairstyle, however."
Aragorn reached up to feel his head. "New.......Legolas, what did you do to my hair?"
The elf raised his hands in mock surrender. "Do not place the blame on me. I had nothing to do with this."
Aragorn snorted. "Jack."
Legolas nodded. "Though I do not believe he was alone. Wedge and Jansen have been acting suspiciously, as well."
"Do you suppose Luke would be willing to help us?" Aragorn asked thoughtfully.
"No. You are not going to get involved in this!" Legolas recognized the light in Aragorn's eyes, and he did not like where it would lead them. "Leave it alone, Aragorn. We have more important things to deal with."
Aragorn sighed and poked at his food. "You are right. But it would be great fun to at least get him back for this."
Legolas shook his head firmly. "Concentrate on Tarnon. You can paint Elladan and Elrohir blue when we get back, if you still feel the urge."
Aragorn smiled humorlessly. "Yes. When we get back."
Somehow, he didn't sound very convinced.
-------
"Come on, Wedge, you know you want to! Luke has been down all day. As his friends, it is our sworn duty to cheer him up. Besides, I know you're bored out of your mind, too."
"That's not the point, Jansen. He's a Jedi. How exactly do you plan on sneaking up on him?"
"We won't need to. That's the beauty of my scheme!"
Jack smiled as he listened to the hurried whispers of the two men. Planning something, were they? They'd need his help, then!
"We just dye his flightsuit pink, then toggle his shower to use that special water the Ewoks use for war paint. No sneaking involved!"
Jack snickered.
"What was that?"
Smiling, Jack came out from behind the boxes he'd been using for cover. "Sounds like you two could use a hand with that."
Jansen's face was a study in innocence. "A hand with what?"
"I only have one condition," Jack continued. "You have to do the same for my friends. Without dyeing their clothes, though. They might still need those later on."
"How, exactly, could you possibly help us?"
"I will supply.......a diversion," Jack replied dramatically. "I pull an obvious prank so that they don't notice you two messing around with their belongings."
"What makes you think we're even planning anything?" Jansen was clearly not used to planning pranks with strangers.
"Come, now, gentlemen. Don't insult my intelligence." Jack smiled winningly. "You need my wits to get you through this one, or you'll never pull one over your Jedi."
Jansen frowned, but turned to Wedge. "Well? What do you think?"
Wedge heaved a gusty sigh. "All right. Tonight, after supper." He winced as a thought occurred to him. "We'll have to give your friends a refresher course if we want them to use the shower, though." He pointed threateningly at Jack. "And that diversion had better be good!"
-------
Jack was late for supper that night. Will glared at him suspiciously when he finally arrived, but Jack just gave him an angelic smile as he took a seat. Now even more on his guard, Will was certain to inspect all the food before he took a bite.
Nothing strange happened during the meal, and Will had almost forgotten his suspicions when everyone stood up to leave. The men poured out of the mess hall and back to their rooms. Wedge and Jansen waited, smirking, for Jack's pranks to go into effect.
Nothing happened.
Confused, they tracked the pirate down.
"I thought you were going to distract them!" Jansen accused.
Jack seemed taken aback. "I am."
"But they're already in their rooms!"
Jack just smiled. "Do whatever you need to; they won't be noticing anything for a while."
An unearthly howl came from down the hall.
"What did you do to them?" Wedge whispered.
An innocent smile blossomed on Jack's face. "Me? What makes you think I could possibly be responsible for that dastardly deed? Go! Perform your perfidious pranks elsewhere." He stuck his nose up in the air in a misguided attempt to look miffed.
The two men rolled their eyes and sprinted away to fulfill their mission.
Jack wiped away an imaginary tear as he gazed after them. "Those two remind me of me when I was like them." Whistling, he strode back to his room to wait for morning.
---------
Wedge Antilles was not normally a morning person. In his opinion, early mornings were the worst part of being in the Rebellion. Certain death? No problem. Price on your head? Came with the territory. Waking up before the sun on whatever planet they'd settled on? Not going to happen unless the Emperor himself was knocking on the door. There were only a few things that could get Wedge out of bed before he was fully woken up.
Unfortunately, Wes Jansen was one of them.
"Come on, Wedge, don't you want to see what Luke looks like?"
The words pouring from Wedge's mouth would have made a rancor blush. He quickly burrowed deeper into his bed, pulling his pillow up to protect his head.
"Don't make me resort to drastic measures."
The muffled response sounded remarkably like a threat.
Wes snorted. "That's physically impossible, Wedge, and you know it. Now, come on." He pulled the blankets from the bed.
Wedge sat up irritably. "All right, already, I'm coming."
Jansen threw him some clothes. "Get dressed and meet me at the mess hall. Luke gets there early."
Groaning, Wedge flopped back onto his bed.
--------
The two men didn't quite make it to the mess hall. Before they could arrive there, Wedge's comlink gave a little chirp.
"Hey, Wedge, you awake?" A familiar voice blared.
They exchanged a look of horror. If Han Solo was here, that meant Leia was, too. If Leia was here.......They would never get away with their prank on Luke. Han would think it was funny, but Leia had no patience for pranks.
"Yeah, I'm awake, Han. What brings you here?" Wedge asked in a strangled voice.
"Just came to pick up Luke. We're finally taking a vacation. I talked Leia into taking some time off, now that the problem with Bakura's over."
"Right. Um, is Leia with you?" Wedge asked cautiously.
"Yep. You want to talk to her?"
"No! I mean, that's okay. I can talk to her when I see you.......uh, later." Wedge sighed. Much later, I hope.
"Sure. We'll be here for a day or two, making repairs. We're still not sure where we're going yet."
"Uh-huh. Yeah. Han, I have to go."
"Okay. See you around, Wedge."
Wedge closed down his comlink.
Jansen groaned. "We're dead."
---------
Jack woke up quite refreshed from his sleep and immediately decided to seek out his friends to gauge their reactions. He decided that the first thing any reasonable being would do upon discovering they had been pranked would be to eat, so he headed for the mess hall.
Sure enough, there he found Luke in deep conversation with Legolas. Neither showed signs of changing hair color. Intrigued, Jack grabbed his food and headed for their table.
"So I would have gone back in time and probably changed things to where I wouldn't have been born, and the galaxy would more than likely be a darker place," Luke was saying as Jack slid into the seat next to him. "And what would have happened to you four?"
Jack raised his hand. "I would have used a lot of bad language."
Legolas frowned at him. "I do not believe anything would have happened to us. We are not connected to your time."
Luke nodded. "So, would me doing anything at all in the past change the future? I mean, wouldn't it be changing the future just to step on a Tatooinian sandant?"
"For the ant, certainly," Jack muttered into his breakfast.
"I see what you are saying," Legolas replied, ignoring Jack. "That is why we could not allow you to go through the pool." He winced. "Though I think Aragorn had another reason."
"Another reason?"
"He believes that if you had gone through the pool, you would be forced to join with us and travel the worlds until we are allowed to return home. He already believes that we are only here because of him. I do not think he wants another life on his conscience."
At that moment, Wedge and Jansen burst into the mess hall, talking furiously in whispers. As soon as they caught sight of Luke, they stopped and stared. Catching their eyes, Jack just shrugged. He had no idea why Luke and Legolas' hair hadn't changed color.
The two men grabbed some food and hurried over to sit by Luke, Legolas, and Jack. Wedge was the first to speak.
"Luke, have you taken a shower yet?" His tone was almost too casual.
Luke shook his head. "No. I just went for my morning run. I was going to cool off while I ate."
Wedge and Jansen slumped in their seats, obviously relieved. "Good. Don't take one until we tell you it's safe." They attacked their food with gusto.
"Oh!" Jansen looked up from his meal. "Han and Leia just arrived, Luke. They're going on vacation. They came to pick you up."
"Han and Leia are here?" Luke grinned. "It should be fun telling him where these guys are from, then!" He indicated Legolas and Jack.
Wes snorted. "He won't believe us. Too much hocus-pocus turns his brain off."
Wedge frowned. "We could tell them they're from some distant planet with an unpronounceable name. Then he wouldn't ask about it."
"Good point. If he can't pronounce it, he won't say it." Luke shook his head. "I don't know of any planets like that, though."
"Ooo, I do!" Jansen grinned. "Acamarachernaracrux!"
Wedge just stared. "Is that an actual planet?"
Jansen nodded. "Way out on the Rim. It's a little tiny planet that exports some local drink called rum and some weird little fuzzy animals called 'fesnyngs' that are delicacies on other planets."
Jack perked up. "They export rum?"
Jansen blinked at him. "You've heard of it?"
"Where did you hear about Acama........This planet?" Wedge asked.
Jansen turned pink. "Well, I was bored, so......."
Wedge burst out laughing. "Wes Jansen has actually done something productive?" He shook his head. "This is going to ruin your reputation, you know."
"I was bored, already!"
Han and Leia chose that moment to enter the mess hall. "Luke! I figured you'd be here this early."
Luke rose to give his sister a hug. "Leia, it's good to see you again."
"Hey, kid, you forget about me?"
Luke laughed. "I didn't really plan on hugging you, Han."
"Wedge! Good to see you again. How's that hand?"
Wedge flexed his fingers easily. He'd injured them before Bakura. "Doing good. They still won't let me fly, though."
"Tough luck. But you'll be back in the cockpit before long."
Han and Leia shook hands with Jansen, then turned to Legolas and Jack. Leia, ever the diplomat, spoke first. "And who are your friends?"
Wedge cleared his throat awkwardly. "Han Solo and Leia Organa, meet Legolas and Jack." He frowned. "I don't think I ever caught your last names."
"Sparrow." Jack said.
"Thranduilion," Legolas supplied.
"Right. They're from Acamarachernaracrux. And how are you guys doing?" Wedge said, trying to change the subject quickly.
Han grinned. "Acamarachernaracrux? That's a great place. Good drink. What did they call that local brew?"
Wedge and Jansen exchanged horrified looks.
"Rum. Best drink to have beside you," Jack answered easily. Wedge and Jansen let out the breath they had been holding.
"Right, rum. You wouldn't happen to have any with you, would you?"
Mournfully, Jack shook his head. "Ran out." He heaved a dramatic sigh. "I've been high and dry for weeks."
"Too bad. You want to try some local stuff? I hear that Ewok brandy is enough to tranquilize a tauntaun."
Jack brightened. "I would be delighted."
Han turned to Leia, who was giving him an evil stare. "You don't mind, do you Leia?"
She rolled her eyes. "No. By all means, get yourself roaring drunk. I'll stay here and plan our vacation."
Oblivious to her sarcasm, the two exited.
Wedge sighed heavily. "Well, that went well."
Jansen turned to him accusingly. "'Oh, he won't ask about it. Make it long enough and he'll ignore it!' Good going, Wedge."
"Me? Who was the one who suggested 'Acamarachernaracrux?' As if he wouldn't have heard of it if its primary export is some kind of alcoholic drink!"
Leia glanced back in forth between them. "Do I want to know?"
Luke slung his arm over her shoulder. "No. Believe me, you don't. So, what's this I hear about a vacation?"
Legolas just sat there, oblivious to the talking around him, and continued eating his breakfast. As a result, he was the only one left sitting at their table when Aragorn arrived with his food and slid into the seat across from him.
Legolas looked up in astonishment. Aragorn's once dark locks were now a bright, vibrant red.
Aragorn noticed him looking. "What? What's wrong?"
Legolas just shook his head. "Nothing. I do like your new hairstyle, however."
Aragorn reached up to feel his head. "New.......Legolas, what did you do to my hair?"
The elf raised his hands in mock surrender. "Do not place the blame on me. I had nothing to do with this."
Aragorn snorted. "Jack."
Legolas nodded. "Though I do not believe he was alone. Wedge and Jansen have been acting suspiciously, as well."
"Do you suppose Luke would be willing to help us?" Aragorn asked thoughtfully.
"No. You are not going to get involved in this!" Legolas recognized the light in Aragorn's eyes, and he did not like where it would lead them. "Leave it alone, Aragorn. We have more important things to deal with."
Aragorn sighed and poked at his food. "You are right. But it would be great fun to at least get him back for this."
Legolas shook his head firmly. "Concentrate on Tarnon. You can paint Elladan and Elrohir blue when we get back, if you still feel the urge."
Aragorn smiled humorlessly. "Yes. When we get back."
Somehow, he didn't sound very convinced.
-------