Constant Path
It was barely dawn when Ed got up from his bed and dressed. There wasn’t much sunlight, but the boy still managed to find his way around the house. He didn’t want to turn on the light anyway. He didn’t want to alarm anyone of his presence, especially Al. What he intended to do, he intended to do alone.
He went down the stairs without making a sound, then exited the house and headed towards the tool-shed. It didn’t take him long to find what he had been looking for, so he quickly picked up the shovel and set off for the cemetery. His step was slow and burdened, and he didn’t have the strength to lift his head.
It was the bitterest of ironies. All these years, he had walked on that same path over and over to pay his respects to his mother. Now he was going to desecrate her.
The soft peeping sound of robins reached his ears, and he felt his heart sinking even lower. His mother always loved robins; she always smiled whenever she heard their song. In fact, the cemetery was filled with them, as if the little birds wanted to keep her company.
Mom…
He swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the lump that formed in his throat and felt like it was chocking him, but it was of no use. So he simply marched on, aware that it was the only option left for him now. A few minutes later, he saw the metal doors of the cemetery, already open to any visitors, and he walked in. At the next moment, however, he stopped in his tracks, because he caught sight of someone else already there.
Beregond stood in front of William’s grave, his hands in his pockets and his gaze fixed on the engraved name on the stone. He shifted on his legs, then made a motion as if kicking an invisible stone. It was something that actually made Ed smile as he watched the Gondorian from a distance. It seemed Beregond had picked a lot more habits from Ed than the teen alchemist believed.
“You know… I came here, planning to say all sorts of things to you, and yet now I realise I’m not sure from where to begin.”
Ed frowned, realising that Beregond had also found out the truth about William. He didn’t know how that happened, but, in a way, Ed was glad that the Gondorian knew. Beregond had finally understood the whole truth about the circumstances under which he came to Amestris, and he could put a closure to that chapter in his life once and for all.
Beregond scanned the date on the gravestone. “28th of February, 1902… You would be my age if you were still alive.” He sighed. “And as of today, it’s been a whole year since I’ve been reborn here. I doubt anyone remembers that though.”
Ed bit his lower lip, chiding himself. He hadn’t remembered at all.
“I can’t help but wonder what would happen if we ever met. Would you feel as stunned as I did when I learned about you? Maybe think of me as a missing link from your past? Or would you be angry with me for living the life that was meant to be yours?” The man bowed his head, and his voice softened. “Even if that’s the case, I can’t say I’m sorry. The Valar had their reasons for this arrangement, and it’s not in my place to doubt it. I can only say that I will be at the boys’ side, just as you would have been. And I hope you won’t consider it too audacious of me if I tell you I’ve come to care about them as if they were my nephews.”
He didn’t say anything else. He simply waved his hand and walked away, not bothering to look at the flowers that suddenly grew on William’s grave. In fact, he didn’t even notice Ed as he passed by the boy; for Ed took cover behind a large gravestone nearby, and he only stepped out in the open when he made sure he was alone.
That also meant that that was his cue to do what he had to do. And Ed had to act quickly, before anyone saw him and asked questions. He walked up to his mother’s grave, and held up the shovel, trying to muster all of his courage. Yet he couldn’t bear looking at the engraving on the stone; he closed his eyes, two words flowing out of his lips.
“Forgive me.”
The shovel struck the ground, and dug the first pile of dirt, then a second and third. It was an action that Ed repeated constantly, almost mechanically, his sheer determination urging him on to finish what he started because there was no turning back anymore. He barely registered the clouds that accumulated up in the sky, dampening it grey; he didn’t pay heed to the thunderclaps that boomed over his head; and he didn’t stop not even when the first drops of rain fell down. He just kept on until he finally got what he had come for in the first place.
It was a sickening feeling to hold the small box that contained his mother’s remains, more sickening than Ed had thought at first. He couldn’t even control himself as he helplessly purged the contents of his stomach for what felt like an eternity, before he finally got back on his feet. He had to close the grave once again, after all. Thankfully, that was a much easier task than digging up the grave had been, and it didn’t take him more than a quarter of an hour.
By the time he was finished, Ed was exhausted and caked in mud practically all over his clothes. Still, the boy couldn’t bring himself to go home just yet. He would probably be missed, yes; but Ed preferred that from the stares he would get due to his condition. It was with that thought that he headed to the opposite direction from Aunt Pinako’s house. The river wasn’t too far from the cemetery, and Ed hoped that he would be able to wash himself there.
The sun was setting when Breda, Havoc, Falman and Fuery decided that there was no more danger of anyone suspicious looking coming to Doctor Rockbell’s house, so they decided it was high time to relax. Breda sat on a chair, while Havoc lit one of his cigarettes and settled on the stairs. Fuery and Falman, on the other hand, simply rested their backs against the rail of the porch, their arms crossed. They didn’t say much, preferring to enjoy the quiet the fast-approaching evening provided. But, soon enough, Breda stretched, then sat up on his chair on the porch, rubbing the back of his neck in a bored manner.
“Well, that has been a quiet day,” he declared. “If anything, it’s a nice change after all the trouble we’ve been through.”
“Yeah, I guess,” Havoc said absentmindedly, heaving a sigh.
“Did the Colonel get any news from General Hakuro’s men?” Fuery asked, straightening his glasses as he locked his gaze on his two friends.
“From what I gather, he sent them away, declaring that Ed and Al are his captives,” Falman noted.
“That same story again?” Breda said with a snort. “Makes you wonder why we’re working with people who’re that naïve to believe a story like that.”
“I doubt Bradley and the Brass pick the soldiers for their brains,” Falman pointed out dryly.
“True,” Breda consented, holding his palms upward in a gesture of peace. “Since we’re at it, where did the Colonel and Riza go?”
“He went to the post office to post a telegram to Maes and Sarah. He wanted to let them know of our progress.”
At that, Havoc stood up, put his hands in his pockets and walked away in silence. He kept his head bowed, not bothering to look in the direction he was going as he got slowly swallowed by the darkness of the shadows the setting sun cast onto the world.
“Sheesh, what’s wrong with him?” Breda asked, raising an eyebrow.
“As if you don’t you know,” Fuery said in a wry tone.
Breda frowned for a moment but, as he caught on, he mouthed a small ‘oh’ and shook his head.
“He’s really head over heels for that Sarah person, isn’t he?”
“Well, she didn’t dump him for the Colonel,” Falman declared half-teasingly, half-serious. “She must love him back.”
“And they’re not the only ones who feel the love in the air,” Fuery said with a grin. “Ed’s brother is growing up.”
Breda and Falman stared at Fuery incredulously. “Wait…” the second lieutenant said, “You mean… Al and Winry…?”
Fuery nodded. “I saw them talking about an hour ago and, I’ve got to tell you, it looks like something is going on between them.”
“I’m surprised,” Falman said. “I would have expected Winry to choose Ed.”
“Guess she sees him more like a brother,” Breda noted with a shrug. “Not that Ed will be all that disappointed, I think. He wants Al to be happy.”
“By the way, has either of you seen Ed?” Fuery asked. “He’s been gone all day.”
“Beats me,” Breda replied. “Beregond hasn’t seen him either.”
“Now that’s strange, considering Ed has really grown attached to our Gondorian friend,” Falman pointed out.
“You can say that again,” Fuery said.
The word had barely flowed out of the sergeant-major’s lips, when the three soldiers heard the sound of footsteps closing in. Alarmed, the men reached instinctively for their guns, but they immediately relaxed upon seeing Ed.
“Speak of the devil,” Breda noted, though he had to admit that there was something off with the kid. He seemed listless, even subdued somehow. “Where were you?”
Ed looked up, a big grin forming on his lips. “Oh, you know… just checking out the place. It’s been a while since the last time I was here.”
“I doubt it changed all that much,” Breda replied, waving his head in a dismissive manner. “This place is pretty quiet…. Too quiet for my tastes.”
“Can’t help you with that,” the boy said, joking. At the next moment, his nostrils twitched as he smelled something. Breda sniffed the air as well, and he had to admit that there was the scent of a pie getting baked.
“Great! I’m starving!” the teen boy declared, and he rushed inside quite eagerly, without even waving the soldiers goodbye.
Breda, Falman and Fuery shook their heads, thinking that Ed was just impossible at times. Then again, none of them were aware that Ed’s shoulders slumped forward as soon as he closed the door behind him, or that food was the last thing in his mind. He simply headed to his room, his steps sounding heavy and weary.
Beregond was sitting in the living room, reading Hohenheim’s journal, when he heard the sound of a door opening. Snapping his head up, he managed to catch a glimpse of Ed as the teen alchemist entered. Ed, however, didn’t notice the Gondorian; he headed up the stairs without paying any attention to his surroundings. It didn’t seem like had any strength left in him anyway, if the tired and haggard look on the boy’s face was any indication.
Beregond shifted in his place, unsure what to do. His first thought was to hurry after Ed and see what was wrong. But he also remembered that Ed was a proud person, sometimes too proud for his own good. He didn’t want to make the boy feel as though he was taking pity on him.
Still, even if it meant that he would somehow help…
Finally making up his mind, Beregond got up and walked towards Ed’s room. The Gondorian was sure that that was where his young friend took refuge. Sure enough, he found the door all but closed, as though Ed wanted to somehow shut out the rest of the world. Pursing his lips momentarily, Beregond decided to just walk in without knocking. Ed would probably snap at him for his indiscretion, yes; but he didn’t want to break the silence in such a rude way either.
With that thought, Beregond gently pushed the door open. Just as he suspected, Ed was on his bed, hugging his knees and looking away from the door. He barely moved a muscle as Beregond walked inside, making sure he pushed the door behind him to sink the room in comforting darkness once more.
“Ed?”
Again, the only answer he got was silence. But, just then, Beregond noticed the small box near Ed’s feet. Only then did everything fall into place.
“I’m sorry,” he said softly.
“So am I,” Ed replied at last, his voice nothing more than murmur. “Al and I tried to transmute our mom in the hopes that we would be happy again. It turned out we gained nothing but pain. And it never ends… not really anyway.”
Beregond heaved a sigh, then boldly sat on the bed as well, facing the boy.
“Ed… Everything comes to an end, even if sometimes it’s too far away for us to see it,” he said. “This path that we’ve chosen goes on and on, and all we can do is follow it, no matter how heavy the burden is in our shoulders.”
“And if the burden becomes unbearable?”
It was a tearful question, yet Beregond smiled a bit and placed a hand on Ed’s head in an affectionate caress.
“Then we ask someone to hold it for us till we’re strong enough to carry it on our own again.”
That was all Edward could take. Closing his eyes, he gently lied down, hugging himself. “I’m tired.”
“Then rest,” Beregond answered and, before he realised what he was doing, his fingers ran through the blond hair in a soothing manner. Ed didn’t seem to mind, though. He simply curled closer to himself and let sleep claim him; while Beregond remained watching over the boy, long after the latter fell asleep.
Ed woke up at the sound of voices talking agitatedly among themselves. Sighing, the boy just turned his back to the window, hoping that he would be able to sleep at least a few more minutes.
What he didn’t expect to hear were cries of surprise and indignation, or to catch a glimpse of a light that could only be part of an alchemical reaction. Aware that this was definitely not good, Ed shot up from his bed and dressed; then went down the stairs as fast as his legs could carry him. The first person that he saw was Aunt Pinako, who was holding in her hands a wrench as a weapon.
“Glad to see you’re up,” she said dryly. “Perhaps now you can separate them?”
Ed blinked in confusion; nevertheless, he complied with Aunt Pinako’s suggestion. At the next moment, he was outside, and he was staring a sight that almost made his jaw drop. Breda, Falman, Fuery and Block were knocked out cold, while Havoc was holding a gun that was deformed beyond recognition. Ross and Riza were the only ones who seemed able to fight yet, aiming their guns at…
…Teacher and Mr. Curtis?!
“Friends of yours?” Izumi asked Ed, hardly fazed.
Ed wasn’t sure he could answer in words in the stunned shock he was in, so he just nodded.
“Right,” Izumi said, and she walked up to Ed without paying attention to Riza and Ross. “We need to talk.”
TBC…
He went down the stairs without making a sound, then exited the house and headed towards the tool-shed. It didn’t take him long to find what he had been looking for, so he quickly picked up the shovel and set off for the cemetery. His step was slow and burdened, and he didn’t have the strength to lift his head.
It was the bitterest of ironies. All these years, he had walked on that same path over and over to pay his respects to his mother. Now he was going to desecrate her.
The soft peeping sound of robins reached his ears, and he felt his heart sinking even lower. His mother always loved robins; she always smiled whenever she heard their song. In fact, the cemetery was filled with them, as if the little birds wanted to keep her company.
Mom…
He swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the lump that formed in his throat and felt like it was chocking him, but it was of no use. So he simply marched on, aware that it was the only option left for him now. A few minutes later, he saw the metal doors of the cemetery, already open to any visitors, and he walked in. At the next moment, however, he stopped in his tracks, because he caught sight of someone else already there.
Beregond stood in front of William’s grave, his hands in his pockets and his gaze fixed on the engraved name on the stone. He shifted on his legs, then made a motion as if kicking an invisible stone. It was something that actually made Ed smile as he watched the Gondorian from a distance. It seemed Beregond had picked a lot more habits from Ed than the teen alchemist believed.
“You know… I came here, planning to say all sorts of things to you, and yet now I realise I’m not sure from where to begin.”
Ed frowned, realising that Beregond had also found out the truth about William. He didn’t know how that happened, but, in a way, Ed was glad that the Gondorian knew. Beregond had finally understood the whole truth about the circumstances under which he came to Amestris, and he could put a closure to that chapter in his life once and for all.
Beregond scanned the date on the gravestone. “28th of February, 1902… You would be my age if you were still alive.” He sighed. “And as of today, it’s been a whole year since I’ve been reborn here. I doubt anyone remembers that though.”
Ed bit his lower lip, chiding himself. He hadn’t remembered at all.
“I can’t help but wonder what would happen if we ever met. Would you feel as stunned as I did when I learned about you? Maybe think of me as a missing link from your past? Or would you be angry with me for living the life that was meant to be yours?” The man bowed his head, and his voice softened. “Even if that’s the case, I can’t say I’m sorry. The Valar had their reasons for this arrangement, and it’s not in my place to doubt it. I can only say that I will be at the boys’ side, just as you would have been. And I hope you won’t consider it too audacious of me if I tell you I’ve come to care about them as if they were my nephews.”
He didn’t say anything else. He simply waved his hand and walked away, not bothering to look at the flowers that suddenly grew on William’s grave. In fact, he didn’t even notice Ed as he passed by the boy; for Ed took cover behind a large gravestone nearby, and he only stepped out in the open when he made sure he was alone.
That also meant that that was his cue to do what he had to do. And Ed had to act quickly, before anyone saw him and asked questions. He walked up to his mother’s grave, and held up the shovel, trying to muster all of his courage. Yet he couldn’t bear looking at the engraving on the stone; he closed his eyes, two words flowing out of his lips.
“Forgive me.”
The shovel struck the ground, and dug the first pile of dirt, then a second and third. It was an action that Ed repeated constantly, almost mechanically, his sheer determination urging him on to finish what he started because there was no turning back anymore. He barely registered the clouds that accumulated up in the sky, dampening it grey; he didn’t pay heed to the thunderclaps that boomed over his head; and he didn’t stop not even when the first drops of rain fell down. He just kept on until he finally got what he had come for in the first place.
It was a sickening feeling to hold the small box that contained his mother’s remains, more sickening than Ed had thought at first. He couldn’t even control himself as he helplessly purged the contents of his stomach for what felt like an eternity, before he finally got back on his feet. He had to close the grave once again, after all. Thankfully, that was a much easier task than digging up the grave had been, and it didn’t take him more than a quarter of an hour.
By the time he was finished, Ed was exhausted and caked in mud practically all over his clothes. Still, the boy couldn’t bring himself to go home just yet. He would probably be missed, yes; but Ed preferred that from the stares he would get due to his condition. It was with that thought that he headed to the opposite direction from Aunt Pinako’s house. The river wasn’t too far from the cemetery, and Ed hoped that he would be able to wash himself there.
The sun was setting when Breda, Havoc, Falman and Fuery decided that there was no more danger of anyone suspicious looking coming to Doctor Rockbell’s house, so they decided it was high time to relax. Breda sat on a chair, while Havoc lit one of his cigarettes and settled on the stairs. Fuery and Falman, on the other hand, simply rested their backs against the rail of the porch, their arms crossed. They didn’t say much, preferring to enjoy the quiet the fast-approaching evening provided. But, soon enough, Breda stretched, then sat up on his chair on the porch, rubbing the back of his neck in a bored manner.
“Well, that has been a quiet day,” he declared. “If anything, it’s a nice change after all the trouble we’ve been through.”
“Yeah, I guess,” Havoc said absentmindedly, heaving a sigh.
“Did the Colonel get any news from General Hakuro’s men?” Fuery asked, straightening his glasses as he locked his gaze on his two friends.
“From what I gather, he sent them away, declaring that Ed and Al are his captives,” Falman noted.
“That same story again?” Breda said with a snort. “Makes you wonder why we’re working with people who’re that naïve to believe a story like that.”
“I doubt Bradley and the Brass pick the soldiers for their brains,” Falman pointed out dryly.
“True,” Breda consented, holding his palms upward in a gesture of peace. “Since we’re at it, where did the Colonel and Riza go?”
“He went to the post office to post a telegram to Maes and Sarah. He wanted to let them know of our progress.”
At that, Havoc stood up, put his hands in his pockets and walked away in silence. He kept his head bowed, not bothering to look in the direction he was going as he got slowly swallowed by the darkness of the shadows the setting sun cast onto the world.
“Sheesh, what’s wrong with him?” Breda asked, raising an eyebrow.
“As if you don’t you know,” Fuery said in a wry tone.
Breda frowned for a moment but, as he caught on, he mouthed a small ‘oh’ and shook his head.
“He’s really head over heels for that Sarah person, isn’t he?”
“Well, she didn’t dump him for the Colonel,” Falman declared half-teasingly, half-serious. “She must love him back.”
“And they’re not the only ones who feel the love in the air,” Fuery said with a grin. “Ed’s brother is growing up.”
Breda and Falman stared at Fuery incredulously. “Wait…” the second lieutenant said, “You mean… Al and Winry…?”
Fuery nodded. “I saw them talking about an hour ago and, I’ve got to tell you, it looks like something is going on between them.”
“I’m surprised,” Falman said. “I would have expected Winry to choose Ed.”
“Guess she sees him more like a brother,” Breda noted with a shrug. “Not that Ed will be all that disappointed, I think. He wants Al to be happy.”
“By the way, has either of you seen Ed?” Fuery asked. “He’s been gone all day.”
“Beats me,” Breda replied. “Beregond hasn’t seen him either.”
“Now that’s strange, considering Ed has really grown attached to our Gondorian friend,” Falman pointed out.
“You can say that again,” Fuery said.
The word had barely flowed out of the sergeant-major’s lips, when the three soldiers heard the sound of footsteps closing in. Alarmed, the men reached instinctively for their guns, but they immediately relaxed upon seeing Ed.
“Speak of the devil,” Breda noted, though he had to admit that there was something off with the kid. He seemed listless, even subdued somehow. “Where were you?”
Ed looked up, a big grin forming on his lips. “Oh, you know… just checking out the place. It’s been a while since the last time I was here.”
“I doubt it changed all that much,” Breda replied, waving his head in a dismissive manner. “This place is pretty quiet…. Too quiet for my tastes.”
“Can’t help you with that,” the boy said, joking. At the next moment, his nostrils twitched as he smelled something. Breda sniffed the air as well, and he had to admit that there was the scent of a pie getting baked.
“Great! I’m starving!” the teen boy declared, and he rushed inside quite eagerly, without even waving the soldiers goodbye.
Breda, Falman and Fuery shook their heads, thinking that Ed was just impossible at times. Then again, none of them were aware that Ed’s shoulders slumped forward as soon as he closed the door behind him, or that food was the last thing in his mind. He simply headed to his room, his steps sounding heavy and weary.
Beregond was sitting in the living room, reading Hohenheim’s journal, when he heard the sound of a door opening. Snapping his head up, he managed to catch a glimpse of Ed as the teen alchemist entered. Ed, however, didn’t notice the Gondorian; he headed up the stairs without paying any attention to his surroundings. It didn’t seem like had any strength left in him anyway, if the tired and haggard look on the boy’s face was any indication.
Beregond shifted in his place, unsure what to do. His first thought was to hurry after Ed and see what was wrong. But he also remembered that Ed was a proud person, sometimes too proud for his own good. He didn’t want to make the boy feel as though he was taking pity on him.
Still, even if it meant that he would somehow help…
Finally making up his mind, Beregond got up and walked towards Ed’s room. The Gondorian was sure that that was where his young friend took refuge. Sure enough, he found the door all but closed, as though Ed wanted to somehow shut out the rest of the world. Pursing his lips momentarily, Beregond decided to just walk in without knocking. Ed would probably snap at him for his indiscretion, yes; but he didn’t want to break the silence in such a rude way either.
With that thought, Beregond gently pushed the door open. Just as he suspected, Ed was on his bed, hugging his knees and looking away from the door. He barely moved a muscle as Beregond walked inside, making sure he pushed the door behind him to sink the room in comforting darkness once more.
“Ed?”
Again, the only answer he got was silence. But, just then, Beregond noticed the small box near Ed’s feet. Only then did everything fall into place.
“I’m sorry,” he said softly.
“So am I,” Ed replied at last, his voice nothing more than murmur. “Al and I tried to transmute our mom in the hopes that we would be happy again. It turned out we gained nothing but pain. And it never ends… not really anyway.”
Beregond heaved a sigh, then boldly sat on the bed as well, facing the boy.
“Ed… Everything comes to an end, even if sometimes it’s too far away for us to see it,” he said. “This path that we’ve chosen goes on and on, and all we can do is follow it, no matter how heavy the burden is in our shoulders.”
“And if the burden becomes unbearable?”
It was a tearful question, yet Beregond smiled a bit and placed a hand on Ed’s head in an affectionate caress.
“Then we ask someone to hold it for us till we’re strong enough to carry it on our own again.”
That was all Edward could take. Closing his eyes, he gently lied down, hugging himself. “I’m tired.”
“Then rest,” Beregond answered and, before he realised what he was doing, his fingers ran through the blond hair in a soothing manner. Ed didn’t seem to mind, though. He simply curled closer to himself and let sleep claim him; while Beregond remained watching over the boy, long after the latter fell asleep.
Ed woke up at the sound of voices talking agitatedly among themselves. Sighing, the boy just turned his back to the window, hoping that he would be able to sleep at least a few more minutes.
What he didn’t expect to hear were cries of surprise and indignation, or to catch a glimpse of a light that could only be part of an alchemical reaction. Aware that this was definitely not good, Ed shot up from his bed and dressed; then went down the stairs as fast as his legs could carry him. The first person that he saw was Aunt Pinako, who was holding in her hands a wrench as a weapon.
“Glad to see you’re up,” she said dryly. “Perhaps now you can separate them?”
Ed blinked in confusion; nevertheless, he complied with Aunt Pinako’s suggestion. At the next moment, he was outside, and he was staring a sight that almost made his jaw drop. Breda, Falman, Fuery and Block were knocked out cold, while Havoc was holding a gun that was deformed beyond recognition. Ross and Riza were the only ones who seemed able to fight yet, aiming their guns at…
…Teacher and Mr. Curtis?!
“Friends of yours?” Izumi asked Ed, hardly fazed.
Ed wasn’t sure he could answer in words in the stunned shock he was in, so he just nodded.
“Right,” Izumi said, and she walked up to Ed without paying attention to Riza and Ross. “We need to talk.”
TBC…
Subtitles