In The Night
By the time Beregond reached to the conclusion of his narrative, the sun had already set and the city lights could be seen through the window. It was only natural. Beregond had not only informed Winry of the circumstances under which he found himself in Amestris, but he also told Ed and Al everything that he had found out while he was on his own in East City – including his session with Dr. Thornlace and the nasty truths it revealed.
Moreover, the Gondorian never realised how engrossed he had become in telling his story. In fact, he hardly paid heed to the looks he received from the boys and Winry. He never realised how hollow his voice sounded, all emotion gone as though he was talking about someone else and not himself. And he certainly never paid attention to the silence that grew heavy in the room once he stopped talking.
In the end, it was Winry who spoke first. At the sound of her voice, Beregond lifted his gaze to see Winry’s saddened expression.
“I’m sorry. I really am.”
Beregond actually smiled at this, even though quite weakly. “Thank you. You’re only too kind.”
It was at that moment that the Gondorian also noticed Al’s eyes. They were dimmed, as if the suit of armour was thinking of something.
“Alphonse, is something the matter?”
“I was just remembering my meeting with Scar back at Lab 5. He accused you of being an Ishbalan traitor.”
“He did, didn’t he?” Beregond shook his head. “He called me like that upon our meeting as well. Certainly explains a lot, doesn’t it?”
“But there’s something else too,” Al noted.
“What?”
“If the Ishbalans denounced Alchemy, doesn’t it mean that there was a time that they probably used it?”
“Yeah, I’ve thought of that as well,” Beregond said, frowning. “What’s in your mind?”
“Well,” Al replied, “Maybe, if we had a look at their archives and writings, we would be able to find any clues in creating the philosopher’s stone without risking human lives.”
“Provided they haven’t destroyed those writings in their wish to abolish anything that has to do with Alchemy,” Beregond said grimly.
“It’s still worth a try, don’t you think?” Al said. “And you said you wanted to learn more about the Ishbalans, anyway.”
“I suppose we’ve got nothing to lose.” Beregond crossed his arms and bowed his head slightly. “What do you think, Edward?”
But Ed didn’t answer. In fact, he was sitting perfectly still like some strange statue, his eyes locked in the void and his face scrunched in deep thought.
“Brother?”
“Ed!” Winry called, waving a hand in front of Ed’s eyes.
Ed snapped his head up as though waking up from a dream, looking at each and everyone. “What?”
“Actually, Brother, that’s our line,” Al said, looking at Ed curiously.
“Sorry.” Ed stretched his back and sat more comfortably; then turned to Beregond. “There’s something that I need straightened out.”
“Such as?” Beregond asked.
Ed pointed at the Gondorian’s skin. “Are you sure this is your body?”
Beregond nodded. “Down to the last scar.”
Ed thought about it. “That means that, when you got… there… your soul was taken in one hall, whereas your body must have been placed in another until you were reincarnated.”
“Yes,” Beregond replied, eyeing Ed curiously. “What’s so strange about that? A human has always been consisted of the house - the body - and the spirit. Once the human dies, both house and spirit get separated. You’ve been telling me the same thing in our alchemy lessons.”
“Wait a minute…”
It was Al who said that. The Gondorian and the suit of armour exchanged glances.
And then it hit them.
They both stared back at Ed.
“Are you saying that…?” Al started.
“Of course! I can’t believe it didn’t occur to me before!” Beregond exclaimed, slapping his forehead.
“What?” Winry asked. “What are you all talking about?”
“Winry,” Al said then excitedly, his eyes flashing brilliantly, “We’ve just found out what happened to our bodies!”
The girl gasped, because she instantly made the connection. “Are you talking about those gates? That’s where they are?”
All three nodded almost in unison. “When I went back for Alphonse I obviously got him back from the halls where the souls are kept,” Ed said.
“While my body and Brother’s limbs were taken through another gate,” Al explained further.
“And they’re still there, until we figure out a way to get them back,” Beregond completed.
Winry’s eyes widened. “But… if what you say is true… then in order to get them back… you’ll have to go back there,” she said, her voice almost betraying her.
Ed rested his elbows on his knees. “Yeah. But we won’t be at any risk if we open the gate with a philosopher’s stone. We won’t be bound by the laws of Equivalent Exchange.”
“And, besides, though it’s impossible to bring back what’s dead, it’s not the case for Ed and Al,” Beregond said thoughtfully. “They’re both alive.”
“Actually, I’m more concerned about my body and Brother’s limbs,” Al said then. “In what condition will they be?”
Beregond frowned. “They should be fine. There was no problem with my body.”
“Yeah, but… you were already an adult.”
Everybody fell silent as they understood what Al was trying to say. The boys had lost their bodies at the tender age of ten and eleven respectively, and it had been now officially five years since the incident.
The boys’ ages and bodies wouldn’t be compatible.
“So… now what?” Winry asked worriedly.
“Give me a moment to think about it,” Ed said, knitting his fingers, head resting on them. He didn’t speak for some time as he lost himself in thought again, while the others waited with bated breath to hear what he would say.
And then, Ed finally spoke.
“It’s only a hypothesis but… When Al and I were taken to the gate, we were both taken apart at least once. Maybe in that process my mind and Al’s crossed.”
“What are you saying?” Al asked.
“That there might be a possibility that I’m somehow connected to your body. After all, I am kind of… s-small… for my age… Smaller… than normal…” Ed’s wincing expression was a pain to watch, and yet the other three members of the party were too taken aback by the fact that Ed was finally admitting his lack of height to pay any attention to that.
“So…” Winry said then, looking at Ed dubiously, “You’re saying you’re carrying Al’s portion of growth too? That’s crazy. You just don’t drink your milk!”
“IT’S NOT CRAZY!” Ed shouted, fuming. “MILK HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!”
“Edward, there are people sleeping!”
But Ed didn’t hear Beregond. He was too busy arguing with Winry.
“Here we go again,” the Gondorian noted, letting out a mournful sigh. He looked at Al’s direction. “Still, I think his theory holds water.”
“I wasn’t so sure at first; but now, the more I think of it, the more it makes sense,” Al admitted. “Brother sleeps and eats a lot, so probably a portion of his sleep and food passes to my body.” A chuckle escaped before he could help it. “At least I hope so; because we’re blood brothers.”
Beregond smiled warmly. “That you are, Alphonse. That you are.”
Havoc settled on the couch in the living room in Sarah’s house, feeling quite content and more relaxed then he had in a long time. Soon, he was joined by the woman herself, now holding two glasses with red wine on them. She gave one to Havoc with a smile before sitting down beside him.
“I thought it would go nice after dinner. Tell me if you like it,” she said.
Havoc didn’t have to be told twice. He first smelled it; then took a small sip, letting the wine linger in his mouth before swallowing. “It’s good,” he said with a nod. His hand then unconsciously reached for his pack of cigarettes, only to stop himself before lighting any.
Sarah smiled, understanding what was in his mind. “Alice has gone to bed. You can smoke if you want.”
“Are you sure it’s no problem?” Havoc asked. “Won’t it bother you?”
“Not at all,” the woman said. “I didn’t pick up the habit myself, but my father used to smoke. I’m familiar with the smell.” She laughed a bit. “Mum hated it, but I always found it comforting.”
“Seriously?” Havoc asked. He lit a cigarette, keeping his eyes on Sarah. “In what way?”
She shook her head at once. “You’ll laugh.”
“Try me,” Havoc replied, teasing her in a challenging manner.
“Well…” She brought her fine legs up on the couch to sit more comfortably – whereas Havoc kicked himself mentally for staring at them. “When I was Alice’s age, I kept having this nightmare that everybody disappeared and I was left alone. I’d wake up terrified, but then I’d smell the lingering smoke, still there even hours after Dad had his last cigarette. So I knew I wasn’t alone. A naïve thought, but it worked.” She brought the wine to her lips and took a sip.
“So you didn’t mind.”
“No.”
“What about your brothers and sisters?” Havoc asked, genuinely curious.
“Didn’t have any,” Sarah said with a shrug. “It was just me and my parents.”
“Sounds a bit like my family too.”
“You’re an only child?”
Havoc nodded. “But there were a lot of other kids in the neighbourhood, so it wasn’t that lonely. We used to play all sorts of games, mostly in teams. It was fun.”
“What was your favourite game?” Sarah asked, interested.
“Lots, actually,” Havoc answered with a laugh. “But we used to play mostly ‘War’. Sometimes I would even be picked as commander of my team.”
“So being a soldier was in your blood,” Sarah noted, smiling a bit.
“Yeah, I suppose it was,” Havoc answered. “I don’t think I would have been able to do anything else though. I wasn’t the best or brightest student.”
“That doesn’t mean anything, you know. You could have done something else if you wanted to,” Sarah said seriously. “Maybe you were more drawn to that line of work.”
Havoc blushed. “I guess.” He looked back at Sarah, his own turn to feel curious. “What about you?”
“There isn’t much to tell, really,” the woman said, sipping her wine. “I was a good student, but I didn’t have all that many friends. I was too shy back then and it took me quite a while to open up to someone. I wouldn’t play much with the other children either.”
“A bit lonely, no?” Havoc said.
“I was a loner, never lonely,” Sarah said. “That’s what I like to think of myself back then anyway.”
“Then how…?” Havoc stopped midway, frowning. “Never mind.”
“How I met my husband?” Sarah asked, raising an eyebrow.
Havoc nodded.
“Simple. He was my best friend.”
“I see.” Havoc swirled the contents of the wine with a slight shake of the glass. “Do you miss him?”
“He was a big and important part in my life,” Sarah answered. “It’s only natural that there are times that I do.”
Havoc winced inwardly.
“That doesn’t mean that I’m not ready to offer another big and important part of my life to someone else if he’ll have it.”
Havoc stared at her, unsure what to do, trying to push the gears in his mind to operate because it seemed he couldn’t think of anything anymore.
And so, he let his heart guide him. He let his fingers brush hers as he took her glass and put it on the table, next to his. His eyes never left her face, taking in the slightly surprised look on her green depths. His hands cupped her face and brought her closer to him as though on their own accord, whereas her hands rested against his chest. Before he could help it, a moan escaped his lips at the touch.
A moan of pain, which made him draw back at once.
“What’s wrong?” Sarah asked, eyes widened in concern.
“Sorry,” was all that Havoc managed to say through gritted teeth.
Raising an eyebrow, Sarah tentatively unbuttoned Havoc’s shirt. Before Havoc had the time to assure her that everything was fine, she managed to catch a good glimpse of the slash.
Havoc expected everything at that moment. That she’d scream; that she’d pale; that she’d even faint at the sight. He certainly never expected her to see her frown.
“That looks bad.”
“It’s just a scratch.”
“Nevertheless, the bandages need changing,” she said. “Take off your shirt.”
Havoc looked at her in surprise. “You know what to do?”
“Just do what I say,” Sarah insisted, getting up. “I’ll go get the medical kit.” And indeed, in less than five minutes, Sarah not only had taken off the old bandages, but even cleansed the wound and started putting new ones over it.
“Where did you learn to do this?” Havoc asked, unable but to feel amazed at her skill.
Sarah smiled a bit, still working on the bandages. “I wasn’t always a librarian.”
Havoc’s eyes widened at this, something that made the woman chuckle. “I had a nurse’s training for three years; up to the age of eighteen to be exact. I was given small, easy tasks at first, really. But then, as I got more experience, I was handed more challenging matters.”
“Why didn’t you continue?” Havoc asked curiously.
She stopped momentarily, a sigh escaping her lips. “The last patient I attended to was my husband.”
Havoc bit his lower lip to stop himself from gasping, but it was too late. “You were… in Ishbal?!”
Sarah shrugged. “Just for the first five months; nurses were needed behind the lines. I never saw the mayhem the war itself proved. In fact, the only way I knew of our progress was by what the injured soldiers would say or by the radio.”
“But… Alice?”
“I would often meet my husband in secret,” she explained. “We knew we’d be in trouble if we got caught, but… we didn’t care really. We thought nothing touched us.” Her eyes darkened. “Until, one day, a bullet passed through his stomach during a skirmish and that was that. He died of internal bleeding.” She tied the final knot, her expression clearly showing that she was getting lost in her memories. “I found out I was pregnant with Alice two weeks later and so I resigned. My father found me the job at the library and… well, the rest is history.” She looked up at him, her smile forced and sad. “Now you know everything that there’s to know about me.”
Havoc cupped her cheek, caressing it in a wish to somehow comfort her. “I’m sorry.”
However, she shook her head. “Well, I’m not. Because you know what I came to realise during that small time?”
Havoc stared at her, puzzled.
“I realised that everybody dies,” she said. “But not everybody lives.” She ran her fingers through Havoc’s unruly fringe gently. “That’s all we can do.”
And with that she got up to put the medical kit back in place, leaving Havoc alone with one single thought. Though it had only occurred to him at that moment, he had long suspected it and he could only finally admit it to himself.
He was in love with her.
Winry was the first to fall asleep. That came as no surprise to the boys or Beregond. After all, she had a big, tiring day. So, after Beregond placed his overcoat on the huddled form that had perched comfortably on a couch nearby, they put the lights out and every one tried to get some sleep. Everyone, that is, except Al, who just placed his soul in a relaxed state.
That was why he heard Beregond’s unrest. He listened carefully, unsure what to make of it, and he was surprised to see the Gondorian getting up from the chair on which he had settled before. And he was even more surprised when he saw Beregond walking out of the door, opening and closing it with a soft clicking sound.
Feeling intrigued, Al decided to follow him. Unfortunately, his suit of armour didn’t allow him to leave as quietly as he wanted and, naturally, Ed stirred. Al immediately froze and dimmed his eyes so that Ed wouldn’t notice what was happening. After a whole minute that seemed to have lasted an eternity, Ed was still once again, apparently caught up in sleep.
That proved Al’s perfect chance. Before his brother would notice anything, Al opened the door and walked out.
“Is something wrong?” Ross asked.
Al mentally sighed. He should have expected Ross would still be outside, standing guard.
“I just wondered where Beregond went,” he said honestly.
Ross understood. “He’s up at the terrace.”
“What for?”
It was amazing to see a seven-foot suit of armour jumping up the ceiling in astonishment at the sound of another voice so close to him.
“Brother?!” he exclaimed. Ed was truly beside him, the blanket covering his shoulders like a cloak and, though he was clearly still sleepy, there was a mischievous grin plastered on his face.
“Serves you right for trying to sneak out, Al,” he said, chuckling. However, he soon sobered and turned to Ross. “He didn’t tell you why?”
Ross shook her head.
“Right.” And with that, he placed his automail arm on Alphonse’s and dragged him along with him.
Surely enough, the door to the terrace was open and Beregond was sitting cross-legged on the ground. He didn’t seem to realise he was being watched, because he didn’t react to the footsteps approaching him at all.
On the other hand, the brothers were dumbstruck to see what the Gondorian was doing.
He was performing alchemy – without clapping or the use of arrays. He only waved his hand a bit and, with only a hint of an alchemic reaction, there would be statuettes the size of chess pieces springing out of the ground before him.
How?! Al thought, shocked.
It was Ed, however, who gave the answer.
“You didn’t just remember what happened to you at the gate, did you? You recalled all the knowledge that you acquired while in it as well.”
“Yes,” Beregond answered, thus showing that he had, in fact, heard the boys’ approach. He turned to look at Ed and Al, a melancholic expression on his face. “I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. I was afraid… and ashamed.” The last word was spoken almost inaudibly.
Ed quirked an eyebrow and sat beside Beregond, with Al following suit. “Ashamed to face us?”
Beregond nodded.
“Why?” Al asked, surprised.
The man bowed his head, not daring to look at either of them anymore. “Because you need this knowledge more than I ever will. You should be the ones becoming more powerful, so that maybe one day you can face the Gate and get your bodies back. If…”
It was then that Al clasped his hand on Beregond’s shoulder, making the man stop.
The Gondorian looked up, uncertain.
“Beregond, Teacher taught us in the desire that one day we would become as powerful as she was; and maybe… somehow…” Al’s voice quavered uncertainly as he uttered that word, “… even become better than her. In this way, the knowledge she gave us not only would pass on to the next generation, but it would be enriched as well.”
“Did she tell you that?” Beregond asked.
“Not really,” Ed answered, a drop of sweat forming on his temple. “Let’s just say that she was a woman that let her actions speak louder than her words… a lot louder.”
Beregond swallowed hard, catching on. “I see.”
“Anyway,” Al said, “Our point is: You’re our student and you managed to get to this knowledge through our teachings. If anything, it makes us proud.”
The man’s eyes widened in realisation. “I didn’t think of it that way.” A broad smile graced his features. “And, come to think of it more clearly… I now have more chances of helping your with the philosopher’s stone. If we find a way, maybe we can…”
“No,” Ed said at once.
Beregond looked at Ed in disbelief. “Why not?”
Ed sighed, a sad smile crossing his features. “You shouldn’t try to keep your promise to us when it’s impossible for us to keep our promise to you. It wouldn’t be fair.”
Beregond frowned at this, taking in what Ed said. “So… you’re releasing me from my promise?”
“Yes.”
It was then that Beregond’s loud and clear laughter filled the night air.
“What?” both boys asked, not really understanding. And Ed was certainly surprised when Beregond suddenly ruffled his hair in a playful manner.
“Though I’m a man of my word, it wasn’t that that made me stay with you all this time. It never was.”
“Then,” Ed ventured, “when you said ‘we’…”
“… I meant it with all my heart,” Beregond completed.
At that, Ed grinned broadly and placed a hand forward. “‘We’ it is then. For better and for worse. Agreed?”
Beregond and Al exchanged only one brief look before their own hands over Ed’s, thus sealing the agreement.
“By the way, Beregond,” Al asked then. “What were you making?”
The Gondorian smiled a bit. “Sculptures of the constellations,” he explained, and lifted a small statuette of a hunter. “This is Menelvagor. It’s that group of stars over there. It’s thought that he’s guarding the world from high above. And this one…”
The brothers listened on, looking up at the stars and letting Beregond teach them for a change.
TBC…
Moreover, the Gondorian never realised how engrossed he had become in telling his story. In fact, he hardly paid heed to the looks he received from the boys and Winry. He never realised how hollow his voice sounded, all emotion gone as though he was talking about someone else and not himself. And he certainly never paid attention to the silence that grew heavy in the room once he stopped talking.
In the end, it was Winry who spoke first. At the sound of her voice, Beregond lifted his gaze to see Winry’s saddened expression.
“I’m sorry. I really am.”
Beregond actually smiled at this, even though quite weakly. “Thank you. You’re only too kind.”
It was at that moment that the Gondorian also noticed Al’s eyes. They were dimmed, as if the suit of armour was thinking of something.
“Alphonse, is something the matter?”
“I was just remembering my meeting with Scar back at Lab 5. He accused you of being an Ishbalan traitor.”
“He did, didn’t he?” Beregond shook his head. “He called me like that upon our meeting as well. Certainly explains a lot, doesn’t it?”
“But there’s something else too,” Al noted.
“What?”
“If the Ishbalans denounced Alchemy, doesn’t it mean that there was a time that they probably used it?”
“Yeah, I’ve thought of that as well,” Beregond said, frowning. “What’s in your mind?”
“Well,” Al replied, “Maybe, if we had a look at their archives and writings, we would be able to find any clues in creating the philosopher’s stone without risking human lives.”
“Provided they haven’t destroyed those writings in their wish to abolish anything that has to do with Alchemy,” Beregond said grimly.
“It’s still worth a try, don’t you think?” Al said. “And you said you wanted to learn more about the Ishbalans, anyway.”
“I suppose we’ve got nothing to lose.” Beregond crossed his arms and bowed his head slightly. “What do you think, Edward?”
But Ed didn’t answer. In fact, he was sitting perfectly still like some strange statue, his eyes locked in the void and his face scrunched in deep thought.
“Brother?”
“Ed!” Winry called, waving a hand in front of Ed’s eyes.
Ed snapped his head up as though waking up from a dream, looking at each and everyone. “What?”
“Actually, Brother, that’s our line,” Al said, looking at Ed curiously.
“Sorry.” Ed stretched his back and sat more comfortably; then turned to Beregond. “There’s something that I need straightened out.”
“Such as?” Beregond asked.
Ed pointed at the Gondorian’s skin. “Are you sure this is your body?”
Beregond nodded. “Down to the last scar.”
Ed thought about it. “That means that, when you got… there… your soul was taken in one hall, whereas your body must have been placed in another until you were reincarnated.”
“Yes,” Beregond replied, eyeing Ed curiously. “What’s so strange about that? A human has always been consisted of the house - the body - and the spirit. Once the human dies, both house and spirit get separated. You’ve been telling me the same thing in our alchemy lessons.”
“Wait a minute…”
It was Al who said that. The Gondorian and the suit of armour exchanged glances.
And then it hit them.
They both stared back at Ed.
“Are you saying that…?” Al started.
“Of course! I can’t believe it didn’t occur to me before!” Beregond exclaimed, slapping his forehead.
“What?” Winry asked. “What are you all talking about?”
“Winry,” Al said then excitedly, his eyes flashing brilliantly, “We’ve just found out what happened to our bodies!”
The girl gasped, because she instantly made the connection. “Are you talking about those gates? That’s where they are?”
All three nodded almost in unison. “When I went back for Alphonse I obviously got him back from the halls where the souls are kept,” Ed said.
“While my body and Brother’s limbs were taken through another gate,” Al explained further.
“And they’re still there, until we figure out a way to get them back,” Beregond completed.
Winry’s eyes widened. “But… if what you say is true… then in order to get them back… you’ll have to go back there,” she said, her voice almost betraying her.
Ed rested his elbows on his knees. “Yeah. But we won’t be at any risk if we open the gate with a philosopher’s stone. We won’t be bound by the laws of Equivalent Exchange.”
“And, besides, though it’s impossible to bring back what’s dead, it’s not the case for Ed and Al,” Beregond said thoughtfully. “They’re both alive.”
“Actually, I’m more concerned about my body and Brother’s limbs,” Al said then. “In what condition will they be?”
Beregond frowned. “They should be fine. There was no problem with my body.”
“Yeah, but… you were already an adult.”
Everybody fell silent as they understood what Al was trying to say. The boys had lost their bodies at the tender age of ten and eleven respectively, and it had been now officially five years since the incident.
The boys’ ages and bodies wouldn’t be compatible.
“So… now what?” Winry asked worriedly.
“Give me a moment to think about it,” Ed said, knitting his fingers, head resting on them. He didn’t speak for some time as he lost himself in thought again, while the others waited with bated breath to hear what he would say.
And then, Ed finally spoke.
“It’s only a hypothesis but… When Al and I were taken to the gate, we were both taken apart at least once. Maybe in that process my mind and Al’s crossed.”
“What are you saying?” Al asked.
“That there might be a possibility that I’m somehow connected to your body. After all, I am kind of… s-small… for my age… Smaller… than normal…” Ed’s wincing expression was a pain to watch, and yet the other three members of the party were too taken aback by the fact that Ed was finally admitting his lack of height to pay any attention to that.
“So…” Winry said then, looking at Ed dubiously, “You’re saying you’re carrying Al’s portion of growth too? That’s crazy. You just don’t drink your milk!”
“IT’S NOT CRAZY!” Ed shouted, fuming. “MILK HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!”
“Edward, there are people sleeping!”
But Ed didn’t hear Beregond. He was too busy arguing with Winry.
“Here we go again,” the Gondorian noted, letting out a mournful sigh. He looked at Al’s direction. “Still, I think his theory holds water.”
“I wasn’t so sure at first; but now, the more I think of it, the more it makes sense,” Al admitted. “Brother sleeps and eats a lot, so probably a portion of his sleep and food passes to my body.” A chuckle escaped before he could help it. “At least I hope so; because we’re blood brothers.”
Beregond smiled warmly. “That you are, Alphonse. That you are.”
Havoc settled on the couch in the living room in Sarah’s house, feeling quite content and more relaxed then he had in a long time. Soon, he was joined by the woman herself, now holding two glasses with red wine on them. She gave one to Havoc with a smile before sitting down beside him.
“I thought it would go nice after dinner. Tell me if you like it,” she said.
Havoc didn’t have to be told twice. He first smelled it; then took a small sip, letting the wine linger in his mouth before swallowing. “It’s good,” he said with a nod. His hand then unconsciously reached for his pack of cigarettes, only to stop himself before lighting any.
Sarah smiled, understanding what was in his mind. “Alice has gone to bed. You can smoke if you want.”
“Are you sure it’s no problem?” Havoc asked. “Won’t it bother you?”
“Not at all,” the woman said. “I didn’t pick up the habit myself, but my father used to smoke. I’m familiar with the smell.” She laughed a bit. “Mum hated it, but I always found it comforting.”
“Seriously?” Havoc asked. He lit a cigarette, keeping his eyes on Sarah. “In what way?”
She shook her head at once. “You’ll laugh.”
“Try me,” Havoc replied, teasing her in a challenging manner.
“Well…” She brought her fine legs up on the couch to sit more comfortably – whereas Havoc kicked himself mentally for staring at them. “When I was Alice’s age, I kept having this nightmare that everybody disappeared and I was left alone. I’d wake up terrified, but then I’d smell the lingering smoke, still there even hours after Dad had his last cigarette. So I knew I wasn’t alone. A naïve thought, but it worked.” She brought the wine to her lips and took a sip.
“So you didn’t mind.”
“No.”
“What about your brothers and sisters?” Havoc asked, genuinely curious.
“Didn’t have any,” Sarah said with a shrug. “It was just me and my parents.”
“Sounds a bit like my family too.”
“You’re an only child?”
Havoc nodded. “But there were a lot of other kids in the neighbourhood, so it wasn’t that lonely. We used to play all sorts of games, mostly in teams. It was fun.”
“What was your favourite game?” Sarah asked, interested.
“Lots, actually,” Havoc answered with a laugh. “But we used to play mostly ‘War’. Sometimes I would even be picked as commander of my team.”
“So being a soldier was in your blood,” Sarah noted, smiling a bit.
“Yeah, I suppose it was,” Havoc answered. “I don’t think I would have been able to do anything else though. I wasn’t the best or brightest student.”
“That doesn’t mean anything, you know. You could have done something else if you wanted to,” Sarah said seriously. “Maybe you were more drawn to that line of work.”
Havoc blushed. “I guess.” He looked back at Sarah, his own turn to feel curious. “What about you?”
“There isn’t much to tell, really,” the woman said, sipping her wine. “I was a good student, but I didn’t have all that many friends. I was too shy back then and it took me quite a while to open up to someone. I wouldn’t play much with the other children either.”
“A bit lonely, no?” Havoc said.
“I was a loner, never lonely,” Sarah said. “That’s what I like to think of myself back then anyway.”
“Then how…?” Havoc stopped midway, frowning. “Never mind.”
“How I met my husband?” Sarah asked, raising an eyebrow.
Havoc nodded.
“Simple. He was my best friend.”
“I see.” Havoc swirled the contents of the wine with a slight shake of the glass. “Do you miss him?”
“He was a big and important part in my life,” Sarah answered. “It’s only natural that there are times that I do.”
Havoc winced inwardly.
“That doesn’t mean that I’m not ready to offer another big and important part of my life to someone else if he’ll have it.”
Havoc stared at her, unsure what to do, trying to push the gears in his mind to operate because it seemed he couldn’t think of anything anymore.
And so, he let his heart guide him. He let his fingers brush hers as he took her glass and put it on the table, next to his. His eyes never left her face, taking in the slightly surprised look on her green depths. His hands cupped her face and brought her closer to him as though on their own accord, whereas her hands rested against his chest. Before he could help it, a moan escaped his lips at the touch.
A moan of pain, which made him draw back at once.
“What’s wrong?” Sarah asked, eyes widened in concern.
“Sorry,” was all that Havoc managed to say through gritted teeth.
Raising an eyebrow, Sarah tentatively unbuttoned Havoc’s shirt. Before Havoc had the time to assure her that everything was fine, she managed to catch a good glimpse of the slash.
Havoc expected everything at that moment. That she’d scream; that she’d pale; that she’d even faint at the sight. He certainly never expected her to see her frown.
“That looks bad.”
“It’s just a scratch.”
“Nevertheless, the bandages need changing,” she said. “Take off your shirt.”
Havoc looked at her in surprise. “You know what to do?”
“Just do what I say,” Sarah insisted, getting up. “I’ll go get the medical kit.” And indeed, in less than five minutes, Sarah not only had taken off the old bandages, but even cleansed the wound and started putting new ones over it.
“Where did you learn to do this?” Havoc asked, unable but to feel amazed at her skill.
Sarah smiled a bit, still working on the bandages. “I wasn’t always a librarian.”
Havoc’s eyes widened at this, something that made the woman chuckle. “I had a nurse’s training for three years; up to the age of eighteen to be exact. I was given small, easy tasks at first, really. But then, as I got more experience, I was handed more challenging matters.”
“Why didn’t you continue?” Havoc asked curiously.
She stopped momentarily, a sigh escaping her lips. “The last patient I attended to was my husband.”
Havoc bit his lower lip to stop himself from gasping, but it was too late. “You were… in Ishbal?!”
Sarah shrugged. “Just for the first five months; nurses were needed behind the lines. I never saw the mayhem the war itself proved. In fact, the only way I knew of our progress was by what the injured soldiers would say or by the radio.”
“But… Alice?”
“I would often meet my husband in secret,” she explained. “We knew we’d be in trouble if we got caught, but… we didn’t care really. We thought nothing touched us.” Her eyes darkened. “Until, one day, a bullet passed through his stomach during a skirmish and that was that. He died of internal bleeding.” She tied the final knot, her expression clearly showing that she was getting lost in her memories. “I found out I was pregnant with Alice two weeks later and so I resigned. My father found me the job at the library and… well, the rest is history.” She looked up at him, her smile forced and sad. “Now you know everything that there’s to know about me.”
Havoc cupped her cheek, caressing it in a wish to somehow comfort her. “I’m sorry.”
However, she shook her head. “Well, I’m not. Because you know what I came to realise during that small time?”
Havoc stared at her, puzzled.
“I realised that everybody dies,” she said. “But not everybody lives.” She ran her fingers through Havoc’s unruly fringe gently. “That’s all we can do.”
And with that she got up to put the medical kit back in place, leaving Havoc alone with one single thought. Though it had only occurred to him at that moment, he had long suspected it and he could only finally admit it to himself.
He was in love with her.
Winry was the first to fall asleep. That came as no surprise to the boys or Beregond. After all, she had a big, tiring day. So, after Beregond placed his overcoat on the huddled form that had perched comfortably on a couch nearby, they put the lights out and every one tried to get some sleep. Everyone, that is, except Al, who just placed his soul in a relaxed state.
That was why he heard Beregond’s unrest. He listened carefully, unsure what to make of it, and he was surprised to see the Gondorian getting up from the chair on which he had settled before. And he was even more surprised when he saw Beregond walking out of the door, opening and closing it with a soft clicking sound.
Feeling intrigued, Al decided to follow him. Unfortunately, his suit of armour didn’t allow him to leave as quietly as he wanted and, naturally, Ed stirred. Al immediately froze and dimmed his eyes so that Ed wouldn’t notice what was happening. After a whole minute that seemed to have lasted an eternity, Ed was still once again, apparently caught up in sleep.
That proved Al’s perfect chance. Before his brother would notice anything, Al opened the door and walked out.
“Is something wrong?” Ross asked.
Al mentally sighed. He should have expected Ross would still be outside, standing guard.
“I just wondered where Beregond went,” he said honestly.
Ross understood. “He’s up at the terrace.”
“What for?”
It was amazing to see a seven-foot suit of armour jumping up the ceiling in astonishment at the sound of another voice so close to him.
“Brother?!” he exclaimed. Ed was truly beside him, the blanket covering his shoulders like a cloak and, though he was clearly still sleepy, there was a mischievous grin plastered on his face.
“Serves you right for trying to sneak out, Al,” he said, chuckling. However, he soon sobered and turned to Ross. “He didn’t tell you why?”
Ross shook her head.
“Right.” And with that, he placed his automail arm on Alphonse’s and dragged him along with him.
Surely enough, the door to the terrace was open and Beregond was sitting cross-legged on the ground. He didn’t seem to realise he was being watched, because he didn’t react to the footsteps approaching him at all.
On the other hand, the brothers were dumbstruck to see what the Gondorian was doing.
He was performing alchemy – without clapping or the use of arrays. He only waved his hand a bit and, with only a hint of an alchemic reaction, there would be statuettes the size of chess pieces springing out of the ground before him.
How?! Al thought, shocked.
It was Ed, however, who gave the answer.
“You didn’t just remember what happened to you at the gate, did you? You recalled all the knowledge that you acquired while in it as well.”
“Yes,” Beregond answered, thus showing that he had, in fact, heard the boys’ approach. He turned to look at Ed and Al, a melancholic expression on his face. “I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. I was afraid… and ashamed.” The last word was spoken almost inaudibly.
Ed quirked an eyebrow and sat beside Beregond, with Al following suit. “Ashamed to face us?”
Beregond nodded.
“Why?” Al asked, surprised.
The man bowed his head, not daring to look at either of them anymore. “Because you need this knowledge more than I ever will. You should be the ones becoming more powerful, so that maybe one day you can face the Gate and get your bodies back. If…”
It was then that Al clasped his hand on Beregond’s shoulder, making the man stop.
The Gondorian looked up, uncertain.
“Beregond, Teacher taught us in the desire that one day we would become as powerful as she was; and maybe… somehow…” Al’s voice quavered uncertainly as he uttered that word, “… even become better than her. In this way, the knowledge she gave us not only would pass on to the next generation, but it would be enriched as well.”
“Did she tell you that?” Beregond asked.
“Not really,” Ed answered, a drop of sweat forming on his temple. “Let’s just say that she was a woman that let her actions speak louder than her words… a lot louder.”
Beregond swallowed hard, catching on. “I see.”
“Anyway,” Al said, “Our point is: You’re our student and you managed to get to this knowledge through our teachings. If anything, it makes us proud.”
The man’s eyes widened in realisation. “I didn’t think of it that way.” A broad smile graced his features. “And, come to think of it more clearly… I now have more chances of helping your with the philosopher’s stone. If we find a way, maybe we can…”
“No,” Ed said at once.
Beregond looked at Ed in disbelief. “Why not?”
Ed sighed, a sad smile crossing his features. “You shouldn’t try to keep your promise to us when it’s impossible for us to keep our promise to you. It wouldn’t be fair.”
Beregond frowned at this, taking in what Ed said. “So… you’re releasing me from my promise?”
“Yes.”
It was then that Beregond’s loud and clear laughter filled the night air.
“What?” both boys asked, not really understanding. And Ed was certainly surprised when Beregond suddenly ruffled his hair in a playful manner.
“Though I’m a man of my word, it wasn’t that that made me stay with you all this time. It never was.”
“Then,” Ed ventured, “when you said ‘we’…”
“… I meant it with all my heart,” Beregond completed.
At that, Ed grinned broadly and placed a hand forward. “‘We’ it is then. For better and for worse. Agreed?”
Beregond and Al exchanged only one brief look before their own hands over Ed’s, thus sealing the agreement.
“By the way, Beregond,” Al asked then. “What were you making?”
The Gondorian smiled a bit. “Sculptures of the constellations,” he explained, and lifted a small statuette of a hunter. “This is Menelvagor. It’s that group of stars over there. It’s thought that he’s guarding the world from high above. And this one…”
The brothers listened on, looking up at the stars and letting Beregond teach them for a change.
TBC…
Subtitles
- Brother's Debt
- Fullmetal Body, Fullmetal Heart
- A Quiet Day
- In The Night
- Two Men's Faces
- Transfer
- Making Plans
- Shadows Of The Past
- Underworld
- The Price Of Immortality
- Departure
- The Key
- Enemy Revealed
- A Step Back
- A Step Closer To The Truth
- A Race
- Rush Valley
- Responsibility
- Izumi
- Time To Stand Still
- Wild Child
- Encounter
- Riddles In The Dark
- In Search For Answers
- A Teacher's Mistakes
- Complications
- Visits
- The Nature Of A Homunculus
- Dante Of The Deep Forest
- Kidnapped
- Fight At The Devil's Nest
- Innocence Lost
- Blood Spilt
- Recovering
- Bearers Of Ill News
- The Flame Alchemist
- True Colours
- Markings On The Ground
- The Mission
- Heading To Liore
- Change Of Plans
- The Scar
- Holy Mother
- A Mother's Face
- Final Moments